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IndigoErth
03-15-2017, 02:53 PM
Inspired by this article titled
Improve any novel by changing its second line to “And then the murders began”

http://www.avclub.com/article/improve-any-novel-changing-its-second-line-and-the-251576

And it works especially good with kid's books! :D Here's a couple I threw together.


From (2003) TMNT book "Tricks and Treats":
April opened her apartment door, letting in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And then the murders began.
:teek:

From a version of Henny Penny/Chicken Little:
One day Henny Penny was out in the barnyard pecking for corn when all of a sudden, something hit her on the head. Then the murders began.

Utrommaniac
03-15-2017, 04:38 PM
Honestly, this was the only contribution I can think of.

Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically knocking people's hats off—then, I account it high time to get to sea as soon as I can. This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws himself upon his sword; I quietly take to the ship. There is nothing surprising in this. If they but knew it, almost all men in their degree, some time or other, cherish very nearly the same feelings towards the ocean with me.

And then the murders began

TheSkeletonMan939
03-15-2017, 04:42 PM
On the 15th of May, in the Jungle of Nool, in the heat of the day, in the cool of the pool, he was splashing, enjoying the jungle's great joys, when Horton the elephant heard a small noise. And then the murders began.

... I guess Horton heard a voice that was telling him to kill.

Optimus Primer
03-15-2017, 04:54 PM
It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. And then the murders began.

DestronMirage22
03-15-2017, 05:18 PM
The sounds echoed, deep and heavy, thudding in her chest like death's metronome. And then the murders began.

Utrommaniac
03-15-2017, 07:15 PM
Now Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let’s go out to the field.” While they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him. And then the murders began.

Or "And that's how murders began"???

plastroncafe
03-15-2017, 07:35 PM
The man in black fled across the desert, and the Gunslinger followed.
And then the murders began.

Or my other favorite.

"My name is Leonardo."
And then the murders began.

Utrommaniac
03-15-2017, 08:57 PM
To Mrs. Saville, England
St. Petersburgh, Dec. 11th, 17—
You will rejoice to hear that no disaster has accompanied the commencement of an enterprise which you have regarded with such evil forebodings. I arrived here yesterday, and my first task is to assure my dear sister of my welfare and
increasing confidence in the success of my undertaking.

But then the murders began...

I mean...it's not entirely wrong...

IndigoErth
03-16-2017, 01:33 PM
:lol: All good, but that Horton one just killed me. (Pun intended I guess? lol)

Utrommaniac
03-16-2017, 02:03 PM
Once an angry man dragged his father along the ground through his own orchard. "Stop!" cried the groaning old man at last, "Stop! I did not drag my father beyond this tree."
And then the murders began

I just searched "classic book openings" and this is one that seemed...entirely appropriate. That does seem like a reasonable place for murders to start.

Optimus Primer
03-16-2017, 05:23 PM
From Tom Sawyer Chapter 2:

Saturday morning was come, and all the summer world was bright and fresh, and brimming with life. There was a song in every heart; and if the heart was young the music issued at the lips. There was cheer in every face and a spring in every step. The locust trees were in bloom and the fragrance of the blossoms filled the air. Cardiff Hill, beyond the village and above it, was green
with vegetation, and it lay just far enough away to seem a Delectable Land, dreamy, reposeful, and inviting.
And then the murders began.

MsMarvelDuckie
03-16-2017, 09:03 PM
Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. And then the murders began.

(Opening to Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)

Utrommaniac
03-16-2017, 09:13 PM
I almost considered the Gone with the Wind opening, but it goes on too long about her pretty appearance (even though it literally starts with "Scarlett O'Hara was not beautiful").

So, instead

Rumo was good at fighting. At the beginning of his story, however, he had no inkling of this, nor did he know that he was a Wolperting and would one day become Zamonia's most illustrious hero. He had no name, nor did he have the faintest recollection of his parents. He didn't know where he came from or where he would go. All he knew was that the farmyard where he grew up was his kingdom. And then the murders began.

Gruesome, gruesome murders...Rumo's a great book and I haven't read it in years, nor the other Zamonia stories. But I want to!

TurtleWA
06-12-2017, 11:00 AM
(From Goodnight Moon)

In the great green room
there was a telephone
And a red balloon
And a picture of--

The cow jumping over the moon

and there were three little bears, sitting on chairs

and two little kittens and a pair of mittens

and a little toy house and a young mouse

and a comb and a brush and bowl full of mush

and a quiet old lady who was whispering "hush"

And then the murders began

DarkFell
06-12-2017, 03:25 PM
This is from Freaky Fred's Poem. I thought that it would go good with this game.

You can read the poem as it was heard from an episode of Courage The Cowardly Dog, that was simply titled Freaky Fred, in the link below. http://casinovasvictory.deviantart.com/art/Freaky-Fred-s-Poem-252155575

Barbara, my love was named,

and her fair hair, a mane untamed,

until one evening, I'm ashamed,

I got a little... naughty.


The look upon my young love's face,

was sweet as lace,

but in this case,

I realized she... needed space.

And then ...the murders began.

Candy Kappa
06-12-2017, 03:47 PM
3 May. Bistritz.--Left Munich at 8:35 P.M., on 1st May, arriving at Vienna early next morning; should have arrived at 6:46, but train was an hour late. And then the murders began.

MsMarvelDuckie
06-12-2017, 03:51 PM
That was from Dracula wasn't it? Sounds familiar.

Candy Kappa
06-12-2017, 04:05 PM
Yup, thought it was fitting.

Original TMNT Cartoon Fan
06-17-2017, 11:45 AM
It was a dark and stormy night. And then the murders began.

Utrommaniac
06-17-2017, 01:40 PM
Every Who Down in Whoville Liked Christmas a lot...But the Grinch,Who lived just north of Whoville, Did NOT!
And then the murders began

FredWolfLeonardo
06-17-2017, 01:48 PM
Many strange legends occur in these jungles of India
But none so strange as the story of the young boy named Mowgli
It all began when the silence of the Jungle was broken by an unfamiliar sound
And then the murders began.

Utrommaniac
06-17-2017, 01:59 PM
This is the story of the great war that Rikki-tikki-tavi fought single-handed, through the bath-rooms of the big bungalow in Segowlee cantonment. And then the murders began.

(Basically exactly how I feel about R-T-T. Just the first two thirds of Beowulf with animals, featuring British Imperialist propaganda. Stop saying it's a story about "courage")

DarkFell
06-17-2017, 02:15 PM
This was taken from an old childhood book that I still own called The Berenstain Bears and the Spooky Old Tree.

**All three of the Berenstain Bears (there are three of them in this story), managed to lose something, such as a rope, a stick, (and eventually) the flashlight, while dodging whatever they came across within the old tree.

[There were] three little bears. One with a [flash]light. And two with the shivers.

[A] great sleeping bear. Do they dare go over [the] great sleeping bear?

Do they dare? Well..

They went into the tree.
They climbed the stair.
They went through the [revolving] wall.
[And they] went into the hall.

So, of course they went over [the] great sleeping bear!

And then, the murders began.

Utrommaniac
06-17-2017, 02:24 PM
Just decided to do the whole first paragraph of The Sword in the Stone, because it wouldn't work with the first sentence.

On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays it was Court Hand and Summulae Logicales, while the rest of the week it was the Organon, Repetition and Astrology. The governess was always getting muddled with her astrolabe, and when she got specially muddled she would take it out of the Wart by rapping his knuckles. She did not rap Kay's knuckles, because when Kay grew older he would be Sir Kay, the master of the estate. The Wart was called the Wart because it more or less rhymed with Art, which was short for his real name. Kay had given him the nickname. Kay was not called anything but Kay, as he was too dignified to have a nickname and would have flown into a passion if anybody had tried to give him one. The governess had red hair and some mysterious wound from which she derived a lot of prestige by showing it to all the women of the castle, behind closed doors. It was believed to be where she sat down, and to have been caused by sitting on some armour at a picnic by mistake. Eventually she offered to show it to Sir Ector, who was Kay's father, had hysterics and was sent away. They found out afterwards that she had been in a lunatic hospital for three years.

And then the murders began.

Original TMNT Cartoon Fan
06-19-2017, 04:48 AM
In the beginning, God created heaven and Earth. And then the murders began...

BubblyShell22
09-03-2017, 06:49 PM
Imagine it's the summer between sixth and seventh grade. You're tan from lying out next to your rock-line pool, you've got on your new Juicy sweats (Remember when everybody wore those?), and your mind's on your crush--that boy who goes to that other prep school whose name we won't mention and who folds jeans at Ambercrombie in the mall. You're eating your Coca Krispies just how you like em--doused in skim milk. You see this girl's face on a milk carton. She's cute--cuter than you and has a feisty look in her eyes. You think to yourself, Hmm, maybe she likes soggy Cocoa Krispies too and you bet she'd think Ambeercrombie boy was a hottie as well. You wonder how someone so...well so much like you would go missing. You thought only girls who entered beauty pageants ended up on the sides of milk cartons.

Well, think again. And then the murders began.

Taken from the prologue of Pretty Little Liars by Sara Shepard. And believe me, there are a lot of murders in those books so that little phrase is indeed fitting.

FredWolfLeonardo
09-04-2017, 03:30 PM
This is the law of the Jungle
As old and true as the sky
The wolf that keeps it will propser
The wolf that breaks it must die

And then the murders began.

BubblyShell22
09-04-2017, 05:29 PM
Who is John Galt? And then the murders began.

This is taken from Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand probably one of the most boring books in history. I think that little phrase would have helped it out and made it more interesting.

Utrommaniac
09-04-2017, 07:18 PM
One morning, when Gregor Samsa woke from troubled dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into a horrible vermin.

And then the murders began.

DestronMirage22
09-05-2017, 12:46 AM
Not exactly following the rules of the game but I think this works really well:

My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
And then the murders began.

(It works particularly well when you remember that David used this quote in Alien Covenant when he dropped the black goo over the Engineer city)

Utrommaniac
09-05-2017, 12:49 AM
For most of the animals of Farthing Wood, a new day was beginning.
And then the murders began.

MsMarvelDuckie
09-29-2017, 06:17 PM
The terror, which would not end for another twenty-eight years, if it ever did end-began, so far as I know or can tell, with a boat made from a sheet of newspaper floating down a gutter swollen with rain.

And then the murders began....

Amusingly enough, this is the opening paragraph of Stephen King's "It". I just recently began a reread, and the line fits in perfectly with the book!

Utrommaniac
09-29-2017, 07:09 PM
Indeed so XD

You don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer; but that ain't no matter. And then the murders began