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Old 04-19-2019, 10:11 PM   #519
The Franchise
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: nWo Country
Posts: 19,127
Well, I mean in theory, someone COULD make a good TMNT movie.

Just not Viacom. Definitely not Platinum Dunes. Probably not most major studios, honestly. I wouldn't be all optimistic if WB or Disney had the reigns, either. I don't think a major studio can ever do a TMNT movie that's anything but a toy commercial.

"Hollywood" (in quotes because I'm referring to it as an entity) simply cannot resist the urge to turn TMNT into a hybrid of a super-hero story and a children's cartoon. And that's not how it was conceived. For however many times as it's been presented as such, that's still not what it is SUPPOSED to be. That's a big part of the problem. And good luck trying to convince the billionaires that they're "wrong". They know better than you, don't forget; that's why they're billionaires and we're just dumb yokels.

You can use a brick to pound in a nail and it'll mostly go "okay". That doesn't change the fact that you're still retrofitting something into something it completely was never designed to be, and the results are not going to be great. It's unavoidable.

A good TMNT movie would almost certainly have to be another independent film, and that's not happening. That's the only way anyone would ever look at TMNT as a way to tell a story, rather than primarily a way to sell plastic. Hollywood's priorities are all wrong, and that's the simple reason why they can't make a good TMNT movie. They don't have any intentions beyond selling merch.

A very strong case could be made for first TMNT movie being the only truly good one. And oddly enough, aside from a few comics, posters, and a novella, there was virtually no merch to even push for it, compared to every single TMNT movie that came after. Kinda funny how that works, ain't it? The only good movie in the series was made by people who treated the story as the primary objective, and pushing product was way in the background. They didn't even make any toys for the first movie. It's bananas. But it explains why it's such a tight film compared to every single one after; they weren't distracted by ulterior motives the first time. Since then, it's all Toys First and if they tell a story that's even coherent, that's just a fun bonus.

You simply cannot grow sweet and nourishing fruit in poisoned soil.

Andrew gets it. Sharp cat.

"I left some words quite far from here to be a short reminder...
I laid them out in stone, in case they need to last forever..."

"But hey... I'm not telling you anything that you don't already know."
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