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Old 10-27-2015, 10:18 AM   #121
Netkeeper
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Hm, I'm also of the opinion "dim lit house" should be "dimly lit house". Not sure if it should be hyphenated, as well.

It is overall a pleasant and interesting read. Perhaps a little too academic sounding.

Also here I thought I'd stick this in here, a roleplay reply I wrote today that I had entirely too much fun with:

Spoiler:
*Simon Blackquill had indeed managed to find at least some degree of sleep while the television was on. For some reason, listening to the voices and gunfights and ridiculous music was better than the silence -- perhaps because, although Simon preferred silence above all things, the sound served as a barrier of sorts. It kept him from thinking too deeply, from contemplating the grimness of his situation once more.

He had no such respite the following few days. He spent almost the entire time trapped in the guest room -- if he'd been asked, he would have called it a torture worse than the clink, but it would have all been a lie. He had access the softest bed he'd ever slept in, real food, and a window to look out of, to admire the city from. He was, however, far from happy. He was "free" from his cell, but not of being alone, and desperately desired the companionship of his closest friend to help free him from the agony of his own thoughts. From time to time, he'd open the window and whistle as loudly as his weakened lungs would let him, but alas, nothing came when he called.

Forced to remain behind a locked door, Simon grew restless, not unlike a bored housepet. His health was slowly improving, granting him a tad more energy, but nothing to do with it. While trapped in his own head, Simon ended up scraping the thick cuffs of his shackles against the floor to create anything resembling a distraction, marking the laminate flooring with deep dents.

Next came the walls -- thin, brittle, untrimmed nails scratched areas of the wallpaper clean off, while other areas got the hole treatment. At a few points, this resulted in his nails getting chipped, bent, or flat-out broken. One particular nail on an index finger was ripped almost completely off, resulting in a not-so-beautiful spillage of blood.

Most of this was done to release pent-up emotion, to keep himself from crying, but not only did tears fall anyway, he figured the damage would help further his goal in forcing the detective holding him to take him out. Take him out and lock him back up so he could wait for his execution, just as he'd been doing before. He didn't need any of this other nonsense. Within a few days, the guest room had become a damaged, foul-smelling dwelling that still managed to have better living conditions than Simon's cell in the clink.

Through most of those nights, almost no sleep would come to Simon Blackquill. It was no surprise that he was awake right as the sun was rising that morning... and that's when he deemed it the perfect time to open the window again and whistle, hoping the intended recipient of the call would hear it this lonely morning.

After about a minute, Simon heard a screech back, from somewhere in the distance. So he called again, and didn't need to do so after that, for just a few minutes later, a hawk wearing a distinctive striped bandana as a sort of makeshift collar was perched upon the windowsill.
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Old 10-27-2015, 02:36 PM   #122
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Those are some good writing samples, guys. Net, I particularly liked your RP bit, it reminds me of some of the RP's I've done on-line. Here's an example of some of mine.

Spoiler:
The drow listens to the story, and nods, but he laughs lightly at the minor gaffe by the human. "Ustdalharn is not a name, good sirrah, it is my rank within my family. I'm not certain if you speak the tongue of my people, but it means 'First Son'. Please, just call me Lothir. I am my father's chosen heir- or WAS, before I chose to abandon that birthright and all that goes with it. You see, in my homeland, our House rules over all the cities of Argonia, with my father as King. We have our High Councils, but each is divided between Matrons and Patrons of the Eight Houses of their cities. That probably sounds strange to anyone here, but where I come from, not all drow are BORN- surface-born elves who commit acts of high treason, murder, and such are often still subjected to the Curse of Dark Banishing; what you call the Descent. My father was one of those, Cursed to become as black of face as he was of heart. He took up piracy, and joined one of the most powerful Houses in our largest city. Eventually, he amassed a fleet of forces so powerful, and gained the alliance of so many of the males of all eight cities, that they staged a revolt that nearly toppled the Matrons for good. They finally called a truce, but the price was high. He claimed the place of head of the First House in our largest city, and King over all the rest."

He pauses to let that part sink in, before continuing his tale. "So far, none has dared to defy that rule, though the Matrons who remain chafe at his rule. And his League of Venom Daggers- a network of thieves, spies, assassins, and worse- keeps the Matrons in line through the constant threat of assassination or sabotage. The clergy of Lolth, as you call her, still has much power, at least within the Houses themselves, and the old laws still hold, but that is slowly changing- and not for the better. Other gods have found their way into our cities, but most of them are just as bad as she. Gods of death, thievery, murder, evil were-beasts, dark magic, un-death, lies, intrigue, even vanity- all have begun to be worshipped, at least in small numbers. Yet the Dark Maiden and those like her are still considered forbidden and punished as heresy. Even my own family would have had me slain had they known I followed her. As much as he needed me to secure his throne, my father would not have hesitated to kill me himself for that. That is ONE of the reasons I left."

He sighs as though brushing off some unhappy memory, then leans back. "As for your questions, I DO know something of both the lands and the Seven you speak of. In fact, Shadowdale is where I first entered this world, and I've been here for several years since that time. I've heard many tales of those Sisters, even of the Lady Quilue, though admittedly, I've never been to the Promenade. I HAVE however, visited Menzoberranzan and lived to tell the tale- in fact, there is an amusing story about that, if you'd like to hear it. I DO believe that some companions and I managed to pull off one of the greatest hoodwinks that city has ever seen! And in the Maiden's name, too, no less!" He chuckles, a mischievous gleam in his ice-blue eyes.


Lothir is the main character in my Darksong story, and also features in a second story that is a sequel to that one, called "Children of the Golden Flame". It's not on FF.net yet, but it IS posted at the site in my siggy.
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Old 10-27-2015, 02:49 PM   #123
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I'm loving this... good stuff, guys!
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Old 10-27-2015, 08:08 PM   #124
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Thanks a ton, maybe I'll post more snippets here from now on. I RP all the time, though a lot of my stuff is pretty damn gay or not worksafe... the gen stuff can go here, though.
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Old 10-27-2015, 08:45 PM   #125
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so doing a small one-shot about a web show I found recently called "star darlings"


in it

Spoiler:
Scarlet dies


and I am working on an Ever After High/Silent Hill fanfic...haven't figured out a title yet...either Silent Ever After or Shattered Masks.

I am honestly just working on dark Ever After High stuff in general, like I have this one where Cedar (the next Pinocchio) becomes a full fledged doll and she has to witness the world around her move on.
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Old 10-27-2015, 09:03 PM   #126
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I know I posted this already in the fan-fic pimping thread, but in case some missed it, here's the new chapter of Tale of Two Clans!

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9536626...e-of-Two-Clans

And I've finally decided that I will probably use Tiger Claw, as he fits well with Pimiko and Kazuo as a "hired gun". As much as I'd love to use Hob and some of the other Mutanimals, I kind of feel like that would be stretching myself too thin plot-wise. Plus, I've been kind of sparing with mutants in this series so far, only using the "main" ones from various versions, like Leatherhead, Mona Lisa, Slash, Tokka and Rahzar, Rocksteady and Bebop, and Baxter (who is in Dimension X anyway).

I'm strongly leaning toward not having any other mutants, although perhaps if I do a third story, I might include the human/mutant "war" there. I'm thinking TC could have been one of Shredder's experiments that was off on some mission, and returns only to find his boss dead, and delivers the news to his daughter. Any thoughts?
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Old 10-28-2015, 12:38 AM   #127
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so finished that "Star Darlings" fanfic. sadly there is nothing on "fanfiction.net" or archive of your own for the show. so here is my link to my deviantart post.

http://yurivorelover.deviantart.com/...253A1446014200

trying something new with writing it, would like some feed back.
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Old 11-05-2015, 08:36 AM   #128
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After 221 pages but a LOT of frustration, depression, and not writing, I've had to shelve my current project. "Rage" just isn't working anymore... maybe I can pick it up in another year or two, but for now, it's time to move on to a fresh project.

Sucks.
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Old 11-05-2015, 02:32 PM   #129
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Wrote this a couple of months ago in preparations of "Once Upon a Zombie"

still the only fanfic it has

http://archiveofourown.org/works/4561752

it has a broken girl, one of my favorites
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Old 11-05-2015, 04:26 PM   #130
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Picked my next project from my list of ideas... on to a bold new start! With my first love, no less... science fiction.
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Old 11-05-2015, 05:55 PM   #131
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Sounds cool, CKD! Sorry to hear that your other project hit a snag. It happens, though. So what is the new obe about?
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Old 11-05-2015, 06:04 PM   #132
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsMarvelDuckie View Post
Sounds cool, CKD! Sorry to hear that your other project hit a snag. It happens, though. So what is the new obe about?
Thanks, Duckie!

"Soldiers of Time and Shadow" is going to be a time-travel science fiction story about a team of independent rogues thrown together working to change history while unknowingly being a central part of a conspiracy involving the very fabric of reality.

What starts as a basic bunch of time-traveling rogues assassinating various a$$holes from history turns into a trippy sci-fi conspiracy epic. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the various science theories I'm going to need to work with...
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Old 11-06-2015, 03:49 AM   #133
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Wow. Sounds awesome! And sounds like you are in for some heavy research. Keep us posted!
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Old 11-06-2015, 12:05 PM   #134
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"It always comes back to Hitler, doesn't it?" Ulysses sighed. The big man looked down at the polished transsteel table surface in front of him and glared at his reflection. “Every time travel story you’ve ever read as a kid or any time travel movie you watched… it’s always about that damn little Nazi with the pathetic mustache.”
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Old 11-06-2015, 02:12 PM   #135
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Hey, I really like that description of Hitler, CK! It's short, but fits him perfectly. Nice little teaser.
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Old 11-06-2015, 03:28 PM   #136
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Hey, I really like that description of Hitler, CK! It's short, but fits him perfectly. Nice little teaser.
Taking out Hitler will be a fun little way to establish in the first chapter the goals of the characters, the rules of the game, and then make things very serious with the twist at the end of the chapter.

To quote River Song: "I have a gun; you have a time machine... what the hell, let's kill Hitler."
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Old 11-15-2015, 08:15 PM   #137
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Writing's going well for me; right now, I'm sitting back and letting two very angry academic rivals denigrate each other. It's practically writing itself at the moment.

Starting to feel glad I pulled the plug on a year's worth of work and transferred my spare time to this new project instead.

How's writing for you guys?
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Old 11-15-2015, 08:30 PM   #138
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It's actually going pretty well right now! I've banged out a bit on four stories over the past few days- my Christmas Ninjas one-shot, A Matter of Time (my Quantum Leap crossover), A Tale of Two Clans (the Gargoyles one), and Love Is Shell. Then again, I've had a lot of "quiet time" to myself the past few days, with my hubby being in the hospital. When I come home after visiting him, there's not much to do but write to take my mind off things.
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Old 11-15-2015, 09:50 PM   #139
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It's actually going pretty well right now! I've banged out a bit on four stories over the past few days- my Christmas Ninjas one-shot, A Matter of Time (my Quantum Leap crossover), A Tale of Two Clans (the Gargoyles one), and Love Is Shell. Then again, I've had a lot of "quiet time" to myself the past few days, with my hubby being in the hospital. When I come home after visiting him, there's not much to do but write to take my mind off things.
I hope his condition continues to improve, Duckie. Any idea when he gets to come home?

As far as Ulysses was concerned, 1921 in Nazi Germany might as well be heaven. He had a man to kill and a foamy mug of beer in his hand, and if everything went according to plan, human history would be better off by the end of the night. But for the moment, killing Hitler could wait… Ulysses was holding four eights.
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Old 11-16-2015, 05:35 PM   #140
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He came home yesterday afternoon. Our kitty Angel has been glued to his side almost constantly ever since, aside from while he was at treatment today. She missed her "daddy", LOL! Hopefully he won't be going back into the hospital anytime soon.
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