Writer's Corner

[MsMarvelDuckie]

Different strokes, and all that. I actually liked some of the scientists and mobsters. Turtelli and Big Louie mostly. Professor Sofo was a fun one, and gets a mention in the first story during Don and Mike's conversation when Donnie confesses his secret. Mikey makes a joke about how the guy was actually half right when he addressed the letter to "MISS Donna Tello". And Don replies by saying he was a nut and questions whether his diploma is actually valid. Big Louie was in a scene where several men were executed by him. It's all in how you use them and making it seem like a credible threat or at least give it a respectful treatment in the story. But I like playing with weird elements and trying to make them interesting and realistic.

[Amaranthus]

Originally Posted by CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy

Copyright that, man. That's great!

I would, but I don't know how that sh*t works.
Doubt a 17 year-old could copyright something anyway.
If you know more about it, feel free to let me know.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Originally Posted by Amaranthus

I would, but I don't know how that sh*t works.
Doubt a 17 year-old could copyright something anyway.
If you know more about it, feel free to let me know.

I'm only somewhat knowledgeable about US copyright law, but at least here, I'm pretty sure a minor could copyright something; he or she might possibly need help (someone of legal age involved), but I don't know that for sure...

I can't speak to Belgian law, but I really think you should look into it.

[Amaranthus]

Maybe when I'm an adult and I publish something I'll look into it.
No idea who to contact for it. But it's not really important now.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Stayed up way too late last night; wrote one half of a conversation between two female characters.

They're bonding by braiding each other's hair, talking about boys, and talking about people they killed.

Okay, I lied. They're just sharing their mutual history of being slaves and how they escaped. But it's definitely bonding.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

Ah, female bonding- the precursor to becoming best frienemies.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Considering they are both now on genocidal quests to punish their former slavers through time travel, I think they'll be bestest friends forever.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

Do I smell a granny paradox a brewing? Hmm.... (Don't step on any butterflies when you go back to kill Hitler- you might unwittingly cause a hurricane that destroys Miami, or downs the plane your grandparents were on....)


Since the last one wasn't exactly to most readers' tastes, I'll toss in something a bit different. Just as a teaser for those reading Tale of Two Clans, hopefully not too graphic. (Or is it graphic enough?)

Spoiler:

Chapter Ten: Shadow of Death


We raced to the garage with Don’s bag in hand and hopped into the van, determined to save Michelangelo. Time was running short, and every second counted. Lexington stayed in the back, out of sight, while Donnie drove- wearing his usual trench coat and fedora, of course. We made it to the police station in record time, parking a half-block away on a shadowy side street, before taking to the rooftops and making our way to the clock tower. Broadway and Brooklyn were waiting for us when we arrived, the stone slab with the unconscious turtle on it lying on the landing of the steps leading down from the balcony. They stood aside as we rushed over to examine Mikey, who had apparently continued to bleed from the deep fissures in his shell.
“How is he?” I asked worriedly as Donatello checked his brother over after we had arrived. He was kneeling down beside the unconscious turtle, intently checking Michelangelo’s pulse. His brow creased with worry, and he began to examine the cracks in his brother’s shell carefully. Blood still oozed from the cracks, which had widened slightly during the trip, despite the gargoyles’ careful flight. His carapace resembled a jigsaw puzzle that had broken apart, only the delicate tissues beneath holding it together. Mikey’s breath sounded labored, almost raspy, and his skin looked grayish. That couldn’t be good.
“He’s not doing too good. Pulse is weak, probably some torn muscles in the abdominal walls interfering with his breathing- if we can’t repair these cracks soon, he may not make it. He’s still in shock, which isn’t a good sign. We HAVE to get that Medilaser!” He looked back up at me, even as Lex brought several rolls of gauze and medical tape over and began wiping away some of the blood from the edges of the cracks with a wet washcloth.
“So how do we get it?” Lex asked again. Don still hadn’t exactly explained what he meant earlier when he’d said I was supposed to steal the device. Meanwhile, I paced anxiously, not quite knowing what to do. Donatello had taught me some basic field triage and first aid, but Lex seemed to have already taken that job. Sighing in frustration, I grabbed another cloth, ran to the faucet in the Wyvern clan’s makeshift kitchen, and rushed back over to help Lex.
Get what?” Broadway asked; he scratched his head, wondering what they were talking about. Brooklyn tapped one clawed foot in agitation, clearly lost. Lexington began taping the pieces of Mikey’s shell together, though it was a temporary measure, at best.
“A device called a Medilaser. It’s at the Metro Hospital, and it can heal Mikey, but it’s locked in the hospital’s vault. And SHE’S going to steal it.” Don turned, pointing to me, a devilish grin on his face in spite of the dire situation his brother faced. I knew that look, and it always spelled trouble.
“Wait- you’re STEALING valuable equipment from a hospital?!” Broadway exclaimed, his jaw dropping.
“Don’t worry! We’ll take it back- AFTER we’ve used it to save Mikey.” Donnie seemed oblivious to the fact that the others were all shocked by his announcement. Ninjas, I thought sourly, rolling my eyes as I dabbed at the edges of one of the jagged fractures.
Brooklyn seemed doubtful, however. “I’m starting to wonder which side of the law you guys are really on,” he commented darkly. He stared hard at the turtle, but Don simply ignored his gaze as if unconcerned. After a few minutes, Brooklyn turned away, tugging Broadway’s arm as he headed up the steps toward the balcony door. “Come on, Broadway- Goliath and the others still need our help to find the Pack. We’d best go catch up with them. You coming, Lex?” He tossed a glance toward Lex, who hesitated, apparently considering following the pair, but then he shook his head and indicated the prone mutant whose wounds he was tending.
“I think I can be of more use helping him right now. As much as I’d love to get some paybacks for what the Pack did to our friend, his life is more important. YOU taught me that, Brooklyn.” The red-skinned gargoyle paused at the threshold, and a look passed between them. There was something there, I was sure of it, but what it was, I couldn’t determine. I’d have to remember to ask Lex about it later.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Holy crap. It's not even 11pm and I hammered out 10 whole pages in the novel, finishing another chapter. I'm fully caught up on my outline again and need to brainstorm the next couple of chapters...

[GoldMutant]

Seven months later and I finally got my first script done with some assistance.

[Amaranthus]

So, I have the rough outlines for a character I'm working on.
He's someone in his early 20's from London (or maybe just England, but London seems like a really nice place for his story). He's intelligent, but mentally unstable. He sports a red armour he put together himself and also uses weapons.
I have a few questions for you guys, because I haven't written actual stories in English and those sucked, and I'm pretty nervous because I think I'll still suck.
What weapons do you think he should use? It needs to be realistic for him to be able to take care of himself without being arrested or killed or anything.
What material should the armour be made of? (It needs to protect him from bullets and it's red. He also wears a helmet).
I was going with long shoulder-length black hair in a pony-tail while in costume and green eyes. But maybe brown eyes look better. Thoughts?
I do realize I'm asking a whole lot that's not even writer-related. But I really don't know who to ask and Cylon told me he'd beat me up if I kept spamming his inbox.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Originally Posted by Amaranthus

So, I have the rough outlines for a character I'm working on.
He's someone in his early 20's from London (or maybe just England, but London seems like a really nice place for his story). He's intelligent, but mentally unstable. He sports a red armour he put together himself and also uses weapons.
I have a few questions for you guys, because I haven't written actual stories in English and those sucked, and I'm pretty nervous because I think I'll still suck.
What weapons do you think he should use? It needs to be realistic for him to be able to take care of himself without being arrested or killed or anything.
What material should the armour be made of? (It needs to protect him from bullets and it's red. He also wears a helmet).
I was going with long shoulder-length black hair in a pony-tail while in costume and green eyes. But maybe brown eyes look better. Thoughts?
I do realize I'm asking a whole lot that's not even writer-related. But I really don't know who to ask and Cylon told me he'd beat me up if I kept spamming his inbox.

I believe my words were "Stop asking me to write your own character before I dip you in marmalade and throw you to the koalas."

Seriously, though, if you're looking for general advice/feedback, it's probably better to consult more than one person. Otherwise, you're going to end up with all your feedback coming from one place and me shaping more of your character than is fair or I would want.

When I send out my novels for beta reading, I always send it to at least 3 people (usually 6 or 7, but 3 reliably end up doing the bulk of the work), so that I can solicit a range of opinions and feedback. Look for the common concerns and questions, and also always scrutinize it yourself.

[Amaranthus]

Please don't. Marmalade sounds disgusting.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Originally Posted by Amaranthus

Please don't. Marmalade sounds disgusting.

You shut up, boy. Go sit in the corner and think about what you said.

It's orange jelly, for crying out loud! That sh!t is my JAM.

[Amaranthus]

Tfw you ask for help, but instead you get Cylon talking about jelly.

[CylonsKlingonsDaleksOhMy]

Originally Posted by Amaranthus

Tfw you ask for help, but instead you get Cylon talking about jelly.

http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads...n-gif.gif?gs=a

Boy, I told you to stop mocking marmalade.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

Am, speaking of advice, you could try looking online for writers forums and writing articles. As a matter of fact, this ties in nicely with an issue I wanted to bring up here. On another site I frequent as a member, there is a monthly writing competition in the writers section of the forum. (It's primarily a comics, sports and movies fan-site. But it was started by former members of the Marvel boards, many of whom are also fic-writers.) They are currently seeking new members to participate in the monthly competition. So anyone interested in participating PM me for details, and I'll fill you in on the particulars. The contest for this month is just starting, so there will be plenty of time to get something in.

[Amaranthus]

My Dutch writing game is probably a lot better than my English writing game. I want to write out my character this weekend. But I really need some help with his details. (I'm really obsessive and perfectionist. I never got diagnosed with anything, but it's pretty bad.) and I'm not sure about these details myself.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

At the end of the day, though it's YOUR character. Think of how you want them to look, act, dress, and sound. Yes, even their voice can help define them. No one else will understand who this character is better than you will. To write any character well, you have to be able to make them come alive on the page. Otherwise, they will just be boring and flat.

[Amaranthus]

Originally Posted by MsMarvelDuckie

At the end of the day, though it's YOUR character. Think of how you want them to look, act, dress, and sound. Yes, even their voice can help define them. No one else will understand who this character is better than you will. To write any character well, you have to be able to make them come alive on the page. Otherwise, they will just be boring and flat.

Very true.