My favorite part of the story is that the cops went to his house to arrest him and found him in bed with his boyfriend.
It's just the perfect punctuation mark on a very bizarre sequence of events. In and of itself, him being gay isn't funny. The whole cycle of events up to and including that scene, however, hilarious. By that point you're reading the story and it's like "What next, he pulled a frozen salmon out of his pants and started smacking the cops with it?" Cuz it wouldn't seem at all out of sorts...
In fairness, the guy did try and finish the job at hand. He even consoled a sick child by offering her ginger ale and crackers. Guess all in all, though, it was just too much. I wouldn't be too happy in his place. Service industries suck ass.
But yeah, after the week I had at work, the dude's my hero. If only we all could just say "f*ck it." I'm surprised nobody mentioned this story before now.