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Old 07-21-2015, 09:17 AM   #2455
Lord of Cinder
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,646
I see a lot of positive response to my summary, so I'm gonna do one of this one:

"She's back. In 2016, get ready to join reporter April O'Neil again, but this time... in a sexy schoolgirl outfit. Seriously, that makes the movie a bit more watchable. Joining her is Stephen Amell as Casey Jones, a character who has no connection to the Casey Jones you all know and love. Get ready to see the first big-screen incarnations of Bebop and Rocksteady, which sounds like a good idea until you realize that this will be the first ever on-screen version of Bebop and Rocksteady, and these guys at Platinum Dunes are the ones making it... And rumor has it, that the villain Krang will be making an appearance... In the last TEN MINUTES of the movie.
Oh, yeah, and those Turtles. They're in it, too. Mostly for Mikey to sexually harass April again, because everyone loves watching a pet harass its owner.
"What's up, Angel Cakes?"
Mikey, stop.
"Correction, she's a hot chick with a head injury."
Stop it right now.
"Oh, she's so hot I can feel my shell tightening."

(Megan Fox) Plastic Face.
(Stephen Amell) You have failed this franchise.
(Brian Tee) Shreddy-O Drift.
(Will Arnet) You need a better agent.
(Tyler Perry) Diary of a Mad Black Stockman.
(Sheamus) Professional Hugger.
(Gary Anthony Williams) Stevie's Dad.

April The Movie 2, Co-Starring Casey and a little bit of Raph. Oh, yeah, and the other guys."
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