[Metalwolf]

I'm one of those ones that will likely not have kids either, and I'm 34. I think especially with females, having kids is really pressured onto you, especially if you aren't one of the types that desire to have them. Stuff like "You'll love it if/when you have one' 'Who will take care of you when you're old?' and 'You're selfish/being immature' and the ever classic "I thought I didn't want them either, until I had one" are often thrown at the person.

I think if having them was not set as the expected default and that not having or wanting them was seen as OK, there might be a few less unwanted and abused children. Or even if the person was knocked up and they didn't want the child, it is seen as OK to put the child up for adoption instead of people expecting and pushing her to keep it (the 'child is better with it's mother' guilt tripping.)

And not having a child for personal reasons isn't selfish.It's selfless, because you aren't bringing a child into the world to be your mini-me, fulfill your life in some way, take care of you when you're old, pass on some genetic/name/family 'legacy' that may or may not even get fulfilled and that is only your expectation (what if he/she doesn't want children?) No child should ever be born with a 'job,' but many times one is pushed onto them, and often they are punished for it if they don't live up to this expectation. Not all parents do this (in fact there are many that don't) but there have been horror stories from people who found out once they didn't be what the parent wanted.

As for this, I'm not saying that all parents do this or are like this, but many of them kind of look down on the childless and childfree for not having kids. Often there is a patronizing attitude towards them, as if these aren't 'real adults' and are little more then immature sods that do little more then party and have tons of money. Or that they couldn't find someone or are bitter infertiles and crazy cat ladies/creepy men.

So to anybody who doesn't have kids, don't feel ashamed if you don't have them by X age. Many people don't, and having kids isn't a 'sign' of adulthood or being mature. Even teens get knocked up, and it doesn't make them mature, it's just shows that they can do what every organism can pretty much do, even down to the lowly cockroach.