Quote:
Originally Posted by Netkeeper
Yeah religion isn't going to work like cases like mine.
Mine's gotten worse. I'm absolutely sure of that. I see a doctor in a couple days so I'm going to see what can be done about that. But I don't really have any hope left at this point since I've been depressed since I was around 11 or 12 years old and that's so many years I'll never have back. Years that I'll never get to live as myself, not the self that's plagued by mental illness.
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You'll only believe in your contentment if you had the years you wanted? Would you be content if you had 1, 2 or 10 years given back to you? Where's the exact standard and why not believe you are complete regardless of the circumstances? Not believing in yourself if you don't get what you want is not going to bring anything back, and basing your beliefs regarding your well being on the fluctuating physical world will only result in disaster because the world doesn't attend to our whims or care about us.
Go and see your doctor, sure, I would never stop you from doing that, but for a minute, I advise you to try and believe in yourself and disassociate yourself from the illusion of control.
And about mental illness, I am by no means denying it, but think about this, Whats the exact standard of being 'ill'? A behavior that is seen abnormal in one society is perfectly normal in another. Behaviours in the past like homosexuality were not seen as normal but now are accepted. Similar, behaviours like depression and schizophrenia might have been accepted in the past as normal occurences but are now seen as a problem to be eliminated from society because they do not fit with in the western norms of life.
The point I am trying to make is, society at large has influenced you regarding what you believe is fine or not for yourself. All societies have had their people base their self worth on things like whether they had a "perfect" childhood, a "good education", financial "security comfort" and what not. I advise you to practice non-attachment and not believe that any of these things affect you personally. In short, do not shape your perceptions of self-worth on the material world and try to legitimately believe and have faith in yourself no matter what stands in your way. It worked for Palden Gyasto, so it might work for you if you give it a try
I wish you the very best for the doctor's visit and regardless of whether i am fully right or dead wrong, I have the best of intentions for you or anyone going through this. Peace