Holiday Doldrums
 

Does anyone else have the holiday blues?

I used to love Christmas. Not the religious aspect of it, as I'm not religious in the slightest, but I used to
love the tree and the exchanging of gifts, etc... But in recent years, I don't know, for some reason I just
don't get the same feeling from it anymore. Part of the reason maybe is that so many of my relatives
and friends are either married with kids or have two incomes... whereas I'm single, no kids, with just a little bit of
income trickling in. So for the last few years, the holidays have produced a strong sense of dread. I start
thinking, "Am I going to be able to afford gifts for everyone? Do I have time to see everyone? If I get
this present for so and so, then I have to also get that present for this other person," and so on.

Another part of the holiday blues... is when you're around so many other people who are married off or have
a significant other. It can really get you down. And I know it shouldn't matter, because married people can
be putting on a show/ pretending to be happy themselves... but it can just stink when you leave the holiday
party or get together on your lonesome, and you see other people walking off and holding hands/ laughing/
having a good time.

Anyway, I know it sounds like a bah-humbug, but I'm usually glad when the whole thing is over. I didn't even care
much about a tree this year. I would've been satisfied with a tree hologram, lol, or something similar. Personally,
I don't think age has much to do with it... from some of my friends, I keep hearing, "Christmas is for kids."
But when I hear that, I think really? I always thought that Christmas was for everyone... sure, someone may have
enjoyed Christmas more as a kid, but I really disagree that there is some sort of phantom age limit cut off
point. Like, "Ohhh, you're such and such age now, no more Christmas for you!"

And I know that this is turning into a lengthy post, but just a few more side notes:

Does anyone else hate it when you feel obligated to buy a gift for someone that you loathe? One of my friends...
man oh man, her little girl! She reminds me of Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka. Just not the most enjoyable kid
to be around. I really don't like the kid and would rather not give her anything, but I give her presents every
year, just to appease her mom/my friend. The kid gets so much stuff, that... I kind of feel like she doesn't
appreciate it? And it's not that I give crappy gifts, it's that the kid is so fickle. One year she didn't like what
I'd gotten her... the kid started wailing and crying, and was about to throw the gift against the wall before the mom
intervened and stopped her. I'll get her expensive things... like nice LEGO sets and whatnot of characters that
her mom says that the little girl likes, but I'll go over to their house... three or four months after Christmas...
and I'll see my gifts sitting around, unopened. Of course, the little girl can do what she wants with her gifts,
but it just kind of leaves a sour taste in my mouth, because I think- well, that was a present or $$$ that
could've gone toward someone else... someone else that I actually enjoy being around.

One last pet peeve: I don't know if anyone else has experienced this or not, but... I often experience this
as a single person... I have a friend who is married with a kid, and her brother also lives with her. We usually
try to get together at her house and exchange presents. I reallllyyy don't care for the husband or the kid (and yes,
this is the same Veruca Salt child that is described above), but I feel obligated to buy for each of them, because I can't
in my heart just bring over a present for my friend and her brother. So, it's like, I'm buying four presents to go four
different ways for them... but yet, my friend is the only one who gives me anything in return. I know it's not about
the getting, it's about the giving/ but at a certain point, I do wish that the other three people in the household would
be thoughtful/ think of me... even if it's just a card, instead of just always taking/ not giving anything back.

Alas, I've written a short story! I apologize! I'm an artist/writer and tend to be wordy.

Yeah, I feel similarly about Xmas too. We've had two bereavements in the holiday period since 06, so I would rather do without it now. But I try and enthuse over it just for the sake of my little cousin. But yeah, overall I can't wait for it to be over.

Btw, Veruca Salt turned into a real MILF/GILF :)

It's a stressful time as a parent trying to get the things your children want to have a feeling of obligation laid on you to buy gifts for everyone. I think advertisers are nuts with what they think you should buy, how much you should spend, and the parties. It's just nuts. We get gifts for our kids, a gift for our parents, and four nieces or nephews. Beyond that is just unnecessary in my book.
I was raised Catholic so the utter commercialization and cleansing of anything religious about the holiday is really starting to bug me. :o

I like Christmas, but I'm 13, so it really doesn't have a downside for me.

I don't like Christmas either. Loved it as a kid but nowadays it's just boring and kinda depressing. Maybe I'll like it again if I ever get married and have kids someday.

I guess the only doldrum that I feel about Christmas is..when it's over. Yeah I said it. I can stand the carols on the radio, the over decorated houses that practically make you squint or put on sunglasses *and I've seen a few of them too!*, and since I have such a small family..the leftovers that might last a week in my fridge. But after the holidays and everyone turns off those lights and the radio stations are back to playing those oh-so-predictable playlists, I'm stuck with..."Okay..what now?"

So, I guess I'm a big kid at heart when it comes to Christmas. Halloween as well. I like both days despite the fact that they make big bucks at the stores.

And for those of you that dislike the holidays..well, maybe this might cheer you up.



What? Thought I was gonna call you all a bunch of Scrooges? Nope. Because there was / is one Ebenezer Scrooge.
http://cdn2.business2community.com/w...im-Carrey5.png
And that was him.

Back in 2003 I got quite irritated at the folks for hogging the television all day watching vintage comedy like Morcambe and Wise.

Then in 2009 I remember coping with the first stages of my mental breakdown which would see me spend the summer of 2010 in hospital under psychological evaluation.

And then last year I made the mistake of getting into an online fight with someone on a forum and it put me in a funny mood for most of Christmas Day

Hope all goes well with no hiccups this year, although I'm already very critical of the amount of sheer dross being offered up on tv on the 25th. I guess that's why you get DVDs as gifts is'nt it?

I got the holiday blues because mom's not coming down. My stepdad's back always chooses to act up right before she decides to travel so I haven't seen her in four years. Stepdad originally hurt his back by attempting to look like a bigshot and lift a friggin tractor btw. No kidding. I thought she was coming for like a month and I find out last Thursday that she can't. I'm not at all pissed with her. I'm a bit frustrated with stepdad because his doctor is actually telling him that the chronic pain he feels might in fact be in his head. Some of it, anyway. See, he can go down to Ar and see his kids and he feels fine then. She says she would just up and leave his ass for a few days but the pain meds he's on make him loopy enough to leave the stove on or any number of things. I'm saving up some cash so my better half and I can eventually go to TN. I'd love for mom and the rest of my family to get to know her. Hopefully I'll have enough by Summer.

Sorry about the parent situation man. I hope you two can go see them way sooner than the summertime.

I also get the holiday blues - I try to ignore the whole Xmas thing as much as possible. I could rant more about how much I loathe it, but I know some people actually have fun with it and I don't want to be a grouch.

I pretty much despise most holidays now, especially Christmas and Easter. All comes with not believing and not caring about the religious stuff and the fact that we don't have family gatherings anymore. Grandpa can't come because of his illness, so it's hard for us to see them and since my grandparents on my dad's side have died, we just don't do anything anymore. So, I hear you about the holiday blues, DG. I'll be glad when the whole thing is over.

Don't worry about writing a story, I do that a lot too because I'm an artist and sort of a writer. It comes with the territory. :)

As for getting people things, just tell folks you can't afford to get folks anything this year because you don't have enough money. Unless they're jerks, they aren't going to rag on you about it, because then it makes them look greedy and selfish. I did that a long time ago- decided not to get anyone anything save for my parents. It makes Christmas far less stressful, because I set a personal limit of two people and I stick with it. I don't feel guilty and I stay free of debt.

As for the little girl, I would just not get her anything. It's very clear that she's spoiled, and just getting her things that she isn't going to appreciate anyway just makes Christmas feel more like an ordeal then it should. If you still want to *get* her something anyway, but not actually give her something that will sit around, why not just donate a small sum to a charity in her name, and tell the parents you did it all in the spirit of Christmas? That way you got something for her in a sense (so the parents can't complain or they'll look like jerks) but you didn't get her something that would sit around unused and unopened, and feel like it was wasted. Know what I mean? ;)

Nah, man, the holidays are awesome.

I like the get-togethers with my extended family and I'm sure once Trey's a little older his Christmas spirit will rub off....but yeah I'm a little bit of a Scrooge....especially when the bank balance drops and there are still people that we have to get things for, as well as other necessities.

Hey thanks, Fell. Yeah, hoping to at least get there around our Spring Break.

And Jester, I know what ya mean about the money situation. lol I seriously doubt you're a scrooge though.

Not really any doldrums. More like meh-drums.

People die, things change, finances are tight and I can't do/get people all that I wish I could... I enjoy Christmas day and whatnot with my immediate family, but the holidays just aren't what they used to be.

I'm not exactly in your situation, as I'm not quite at that stage of life where my friends are all marrying and having kids...but I can imagine myself being in the same boat as you in 5 years or so.

Christmas has basically already lost most of its magic for me. Was never about getting presents; it was always about seeing people I only see once a year. Now that that isn't happening anymore, I pretty much only look forward to it as a break from school. And, being on a stingy college budget as I am, buying presents isn't something I'm really open to...not this year, anyway.

Nope. I'm way too busy during the season to feel bummed ever. So much family stuff.

well lets just say after the week i've had, BAH FREAKIN HUMBUG! I can't wait til it's here and done

Thanks for the replies thus far everyone :) @ The Canadiandrome, *high five!* Ha ha!
I empathize.

@ DarkFell, *laughing, those videos are great! They made me feel a little better. It was
cathartic as well, just to be able to share some grievances about the holiday season.

Metalwolf... nice to meet a fellow artist, and thanks also for the suggestions. For a while,
I was hoping that lil' Ms. Veruca Salt would naturally grow out of the selfish behavior... but
unfortunately at this juncture (she's about to enter into her teens) I have a feeling that it's
just going to get worse. *Sigh* We'll see. Yeah, I've pretty much reached the point where
I feel like there is no pleasing her, no matter what present she gets.

For those that have lost loved ones around the holidays, and for those who will miss out on
seeing that special person: *BIG hug* It's so hard to get through the holidays when something
like that happens. My grandmother passed away a little over three years ago, and Christmas
hasn't really been the same since. Her birthday was near Christmas– today in fact– so it
just makes it that much harder to cope. I try to keep in mind that she wouldn't want her loved
ones to feel depressed... but again, it's difficult. It set the stage for certain relatives not to
make an appearance anymore at Christmas... everyone just scattered to the wind.

To end on a humorous note, a few years ago, I drank Bloody Marys all day long on Christmas.
All else failed to give me that warm and fuzzy feeling, so I took matters into my own hands.
I was feeling no pain! Maybe I should make it a new tradition for myself... whatever gets me
through :)

Charlie brown sums it up pretty nicely, by the way:

http://youtu.be/8DKh0bQsE60

lol! hell yes, drinking! rofl! :lol:

@Don Gaddis: Glad you like the videos. Twisted Christmas is a bit of a traditional staple in my family. The last guy's comments in Twelve Pains of Christmas crack us up to no end.

Yeah, Christmas hasn't really been much fun for us either, for the last few years, alas. His dad died a few years ago on my birthday, (which was earlier this month) and my step-dad's mom died several years ago just before her birthday- which is New Years Day. My granddad died the year after we first got together, also shortly before his birthday, which is around Christmas. On top of it all, we barely ever have money to get gifts for each other and our parents, much less anyone else. It sucks. Especially this year.

I love Christmas.

Do I get big fancy presents? No. Do I buy gifts for family that blow my budget sometimes? Sure.

But for me, it's really just about enjoying being with family, eating good food, and making others happy.

My family isn't perfect. People drink, people are on the brink of divorce, and all the typical fun.... But something magical happens for me on that day and the days leading up and I feel like a small kid again. I can't help but feel happy and excited.

Sometimes when bad stuff happens it's super easy to remain laser focused on that. I learned a few years ago that focusing on those bad things all the time really makes you stop being able to see the good. So I started actively looking for the good. And guess what? It's all over the place. :)

I've just realised its 6 days till Christmas and I couldn't be any less bothered.

Actually, it's eight. But I feel you there. I'm barely even into the spirit at all. Haven't even put up the tree, and it's been sitting in the box in my living room for days now.

Not for me, this is my favorite time of the year!

Our tree was put up Sunday, not yet decorated. It's fake and has permanent lights so it's at least plugged in so far.

I miss having a real tree, but on the plus side I like that there is one that may live a bit longer because we didn't go out and kill it. Still miss real ones though. Switched a few years ago thanks to the derpiest cat in the house. We've NEVER had issues with cats until now. This one however decided to eat a bunch of pin needles and the fur off a toy mouse, caused himself a nice intestinal blockage and he's lucky to still be alive.

IndigoErth, yeah, my tree went up this Sunday too. It's in the living room
undecorated at the moment. I'll probably start decorating it tonight and at
least get the lights on. We always get a real tree, but lately I'm starting to
feel similarly to you. I just hate that the tree is chopped down, just so we
can hang blinking lights and ornaments on it. Your cat! Oh no... hopefully
the cat will not do that again. The worst thing that mine does is maybe
knock one or two ornaments off the tree and play soccer ball with them.

@ MsMarvelDuckie, I'm so sorry to hear about your loved ones... *BIG hug*
It will take time to heal... but yes, it makes the holidays very difficult to endure.
And, wow, you and Whatswiththeheadbands have both just reminded me that it's
pretty much only a week until Christmas. I still have so many people left to buy
for. Some of the little stocking stuffers are out of the way, but that's about it.

Katie and Donatello19, thanks for the sunshine :) As often is the case with people
who are down or depressed, it's nigh on impossible to see a speck of light. I mean,
it could be bright and sunny outside, with nothing truly wrong with the world, and the
blues can still come on like a sledgehammer. I do enjoy watching others open their gifts.
As of late, I usually just stack mine in a corner and watch everyone else open their
gifts first.

The most fun that I have during the holidays now happens when I go over
to a friend's house... she and her sister and I, we're all single/ like-minded,
so we mostly just sit around and talk, eat cake, and drink coffee. There is
no hectic atmosphere whatsoever. We do bring gifts, but the gifts are almost
like an afterthought and there is no pressure about anything/ no crazy rushing
around to prepare a big meal, decorate, clean, etc.

you're both wrong, it's actually 9 :lol: :P

I'm always fascinated by the concept of people having live trees - in Australia, we only have plastic ones (for obvious reasons). The older I get, the more the snow and fluffy suits and traditional Xmas imagery being used over here just seems really weird.

I always feel pretty bad for the leftover pre-cut trees left standing standing in the tree lots. I realize it makes it easier for people who don't have the time or care to go to a tree farm and cut it themselves, but I really think there should be a very limited amount of trees available at any one time. Far too many don't seem to get homes when pine are slow growing to begin with.

When I was growing up we'd at least put the real ones we had in the backyard after Christmas for the critters to use as cover and then chip it for mulch in the spring.

lol Reminds me I keep meaning to ask a friend/co-"worker" on a small private server for an MMO game (and an Aussie) what touches of her traditions we might be able to add to the holiday event areas we've built over the past couple of years. I feel bad that it's generally always northern hemisphere/American oriented. (Though the makers of the game and the owner of the server are American.) Although she was the main author of the Christmas/winter event and seems to enjoy the mental escape if it's hot where she is. lol :)

We don't have our tree up because we have no room for it anymore, but it was always a nice little tree. Only gift I buy is for my BF and that's it. We haven't even gotten together yet, but I do enjoy getting him stuff. I'm not one for wanting anything, so I pretty much just say I don't want anything because I just don't care anymore. People get me stuff anyway though.

That's the thing Indigo - Australian Xmas is like, literally exactly the same as American Xmas except we're doing it all in million-degree heat, we add seafood to the menu and we go to the beach afterwards. And everyone uses it as (yet another) excuse to get blisteringly drunk, because drinking is Australia's national passtime.

And sometimes we pretend that kangaroos pull Santa's sleigh when he's over here.

The whole thing is utterly bizarre (bordering on perverse and sadistic). The older I get, the crazier it seems to be sitting down to a roast turkey dinner in 40 degree weather, watching movies where people are rugged up and frolicking in the snow.

That basically sums up summer in Louisiana.

I'm with you. My family has always resisted the trappings of a winter Christmas. For one thing, it's too damn hot to eat a heavy roast meal, so we usually have a spread of cold foods and salad.

Regarding holiday doldrums - I want to love Christmas, and that is probably why it often ends up being depressing. I live alone, so I spend a lot of the holidays by myself. My extended family is shrinking at an alarming rate, and my siblings have their own stuff going on, so Christmas is over pretty quickly. I'm just going to accept it this year, and try to take it easy.

I made this animated card a few years ago - I was trying to capture the feeling of an Australian Christmas. I may or may not have succeeded.

Gunpowder, have you ever known it to snow where you are in Louisiana? I lived in Savannah, GA
for a few years... which isn't too dissimilar from New Orleans. It snowed once while I was in Savannah,
just enough to give everything a very thin coating. It melted in less than half an hour. But it was so
strange, seeing snow settle on palm trees. So I can't imagine how pennydreadful and Proactive Man
must feel. On a side note, Australia sounds like my kind of place :). I'm fascinated by bottle trees
for some reason...

Oh, and Proactive Man, yes... understand you in regard to how quickly Christmas is over. The relatives
of mine that still come by... they are in and out of here in just a little under two hours usually. It's pretty
much: "Hi. Feed me. Give me money. Bye." lol. But I do enjoy seeing them and spending that little
bit of time with them. There are certainly worse things in the world than a speedy Christmas!

BubblyShell22, my mom and I bought a small tree for the first time this year. Usually the top of it
hits the ceiling, but it's more Charlie Brown size this time around. I couldn't believe how much
easier it was to put up (had it up in an hour), as opposed to a larger one (an all day affair).

I was not counting that same day- I started from the next FULL day, thank you. So it WAS eight. NOW it is six.

I've been more upbeat than usual lately, but now that I got my mandatory Pre-Christmas Respiratory Infection and don't think I'll be well in time for Christmas (if past experience is any indication), I'm pretty f*cking pissed.

Like, this time of year generally does suck for me. My Mom's Birthday was Christmas Eve, so ever since she died in 1997, it's an annual reminder about how f*cked up and unfair life can be. THEN my Dad died Christmas Eve in 2010, and no sh*t, I had to spend the entire weekend listening to people tell me I "should still be happy anyway because it's Christmas!" Like, his body isn't even cold yet, you f*cking jackals, take your tinsel and cram it. That really pissed me off.

So yeah, I generally get pretty depressed this time of year because of that stuff, partly because Christmas used to be AMAZING with my family before everybody chose drugs. And, being a Northeasterner, snow lost 150% of its fun and novelty a long, long time ago. It's pretty through the window, but that's about it. All you folks who love it so much can have it. You can have the constant power-outages, and having to move people into a four-bedroom house in the middle of a blizzard after spending two hours digging the truck out of four feet of snow (SO glad I don't have to do that sh*t anymore), you can have your TV reception be non-existent because of too much snow on the dish, and you can totally have being stuck inside with no electricity or food for almost a week because you don't happen to live on a major arterial roadway and thus don't deserve to ever see a plow come your way. You can have ALL of that and keep it.

Add in the fact that I spend about 8 months out of the year coughing up bloody mucous, and yeah, it's less about the "Holidays" in general, it's that Winter can entirely go f*ck itself. I don't see how anyone could like this time of year. It's nothing but months and months of cold, ice, sickness and death. What's to love? It makes ZERO sense to me why we have these major holidays at THIS time of year, when nobody can even hug their relatives without being scared they're gonna catch the flu. I vote we move Christmas season to August so people can f*cking enjoy themselves. This time of year is f*cking garbage.

I...what? Canadianguy was right, it was nine days yesterday. Today, the 17th, it is eight.

18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25

Eight dates starting with the next full day like you said. Eight. Midnight tonight will be seven. Counting is hard.