What Grinds Your Gears? :)

[ProactiveMan]

Originally Posted by MewMeow

Great! I am very close to my mum. I hate my dad. I am so filled with rage with him I want to do this: http://i.imgur.com/i9zBusO.gif
Yeah, and now that they're divorced, my dad got married. Now his disgusting thing he calls a "wife" keeps liking my mum's Facebook page and crap. My God just die already. Actually, no I need the money from your punk a**.

Do something fun to take your mind off it.

I forgot to say... I watched that koala gif for about five minutes. I couldn't look away.

[Peanut]

There are few things in the world that bug me more than people with massive egos who have zero reason to have one. Huge egos are awful anyways, but when it's coming from someone who is an enormous failure and has absolutely nothing in their life it's infuriating.

When I was 18 I worked with some grocery store lifers who were just the greatest things on the planet. They knew everything about everything, looked down on everyone, yet they were stuck in dead end jobs in their 30's and 40's. In my line of work now I meet a lot of mid-40's gofers who have the world solved and tell me how everything in life works...yet they're still running for coffee for someone half their age. Where does the ego come from!?

[ZariusTwo]

Ego's a bit like a penis substitute if you can't drive.

[Katie]

Originally Posted by Powder

Your loss is a terrible thing but it doesn't make you the morality police. You may be right when it comes to an 11 year old holding a grudge over matters they're not keen to, but it doesn't work across the board. If someone gets raped or beaten by a parent & doesn't cry when they die, that doesn't make them a sad or monstrous person. There are many unique circumstances that those other than the one enduring it really have no place to judge.

And all I'm saying is that you have no idea what you will feel until that day and saying you will be unequivocally happy is Probably going to end up being false. I'm telling you that you will likely not feel happy or satisfied. And there's the thing about seeing someone they apparently do care about, the mother, mourn her loss. They gonna be jerky and say she's better off with him dead? How would you feel if someone said that when your husband died? I went through that too and I can tell you that sucks more than you'll ever know.

Also, even if someone is beating or raping people it still, in my opinion, pretty sh!tty to wish for their death. Be a better person. To me, wishing for their death just puts you down on their level. Period end of story.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

Originally Posted by MewMeow

Yes. I don't trust him. I hate him. And my sis actually likes him, so he has to come in my house.
I haven't done anything worse then yell at his. I'm trying to ignore his existence, and it would be way more easy for everyone in my family if he just died. His wife is pretty much rich, and my family is broke. I agree with you on this. Joy would burst out of me if that happened. But hey, my birthday is Wednesday so I have something to be happy about.

Well, to be fair, an affair or divorce isn't really enough of a reason to hate that much, though I do understand how you feel- but as Katie said, there are probably other things at play that you may not know about. Hope you know that there are bigger and worse thing than simply not liking who someone marries. Trust me- as long as he's been an okay parent (ie not abusive, neglectful, etc) then you might try to be more understanding.

Originally Posted by Katie

I sincerely hope that both of you have better reasons to hate your respective parents than a divorce or differing opinions on social issues.

Divorce sometimes is the best thing for all involved. Kids rarely get the whole and true story. If someone doesn't accept yor beliefs or your stance on social issues and you wish death on them that is more messed up than anything that person did or said to you.

I know people who were abused by parents who still feel emotion when they die. It's human to. If you feel nothing I'm sincerely sad for you. You must have a miserable life devoting that much time to hate.

You know, I've touched on MY reasons for despising my stepdad before, which includes everything from emotional neglect, verbal bullying, outright physical abuse, and even some molestation, so DON'T try to tell me how I would or SHOULD feel about him. He is a racist, antisocial, homophobic, abusive, and narrow-minded pig, a poor excuse for a human being who DOES deserve whatever karmic retribution the world may have coming to him eventually.

I don't devote that much time to hating him, honestly. I actually try to have as LITTLE to do with him as possible, even in my thoughts! Because as much as I DO hate the man, I don't focus on it much unless I actually HAVE to think about/be around him. Because I'd rather he simply didn't exist AT ALL. Try to pretend he doesn't, most of the time. Unless I have to be around him, it usually works. Doesn't make me sad or miserable, either. I simply get along MUCH better without him in my life, and I would be even better off if he were completely out of it. Period.

Originally Posted by Powder

Your loss is a terrible thing but it doesn't make you the morality police. You may be right when it comes to an 11 year old holding a grudge over matters they're not keen to, but it doesn't work across the board. If someone gets raped or beaten by a parent & doesn't cry when they die, that doesn't make them a sad or monstrous person. There are many unique circumstances that those other than the one enduring it really have no place to judge.

For once, we agree, Powder. This is precisely the reason I said what I did.

Originally Posted by Katie

And all I'm saying is that you have no idea what you will feel until that day and saying you will be unequivocally happy is Probably going to end up being false. I'm telling you that you will likely not feel happy or satisfied. And there's the thing about seeing someone they apparently do care about, the mother, mourn her loss. They gonna be jerky and say she's better off with him dead? How would you feel if someone said that when your husband died? I went through that too and I can tell you that sucks more than you'll ever know.

Also, even if someone is beating or raping people it still, in my opinion, pretty sh!tty to wish for their death. Be a better person. To me, wishing for their death just puts you down on their level. Period end of story.

I HAVE been through death of loved ones. All of my grandparents are gone but one, and even my father-in-law died a few years ago. I was more broken up about HIS death than I would ever be about the scum-ball that I refer to as "dad". Because he is my father in name only. Not even that, as we don't even share the same last name- never did. He didn't even legally claim me! So I've had my mom's maiden name until I married, which is fine with me. As step-parents go, he's even worse than Cinderella's. As far as I'm concerned, things like abuse are just unforgivable, and wanting that person out of your life permanently is not only human, it's perfectly understandable. Not saying I'd actually try to DO anything about it, but given the man's eating and exercise habits (which are atrocious) I'm more than happy to let the universe take care of it for me. As for my mom, even she would be better off, as he's been controlling and intimidating to her, as well, if not quite abusive. He's just a really crappy human being, and she could do so much better. So, although I would feel bad for HER (though I suspect they only stayed together out of convenience and desperation) I would NOT shed a tear for or about him.

[Katie]

Let me put it this way:

Will his death change anything? At all? Will you still feel angry when you think of him and what he did? Will your feelings change on the day after he dies, or will it be the same for you as the day before? If it won't change, what good does the actual death do you?

Why let him win in life? Why let him make you so angry that you wish for someone to die?

Wishing death on someone for ills done to you, whether actual or just in perception, lowers you.

I've been tormented all my life. Know what the best thing to do is? Separate yourself and let go of the anger. The person isn't worth it. They aren't worth the time you spend on them. But even still I don't wish death. I wish to be happy and move in a better direction so that I can prove that they don't control me and that i am worth it. They need to see that

[pennydreadful]

Originally Posted by Peanut

There are few things in the world that bug me more than people with massive egos who have zero reason to have one. Huge egos are awful anyways, but when it's coming from someone who is an enormous failure and has absolutely nothing in their life it's infuriating.

When I was 18 I worked with some grocery store lifers who were just the greatest things on the planet. They knew everything about everything, looked down on everyone, yet they were stuck in dead end jobs in their 30's and 40's. In my line of work now I meet a lot of mid-40's gofers who have the world solved and tell me how everything in life works...yet they're still running for coffee for someone half their age. Where does the ego come from!?

Working at a grocery store does not make someone a failure. How someone chooses to sell their labor has nothing to do with whether or not they're a worthwhile person, or whether their life is wasted. What's important is living a happy and fulfilling life, not how many zeroes are on your payslip at the end of the week.

Irritating blowhards are irritating whether or not they're bankers or politicians or grocery store employees.

[Cure]

No, working at a grocery store is failing pretty hard.

[Peanut]

Originally Posted by pennydreadful

Working at a grocery store does not make someone a failure. How someone chooses to sell their labor has nothing to do with whether or not they're a worthwhile person, or whether their life is wasted. What's important is living a happy and fulfilling life, not how many zeroes are on your payslip at the end of the week.

Good thing that wasn't my point at all and you've created this fake scenario wherein I denounce all retail employees as worthless human beings. Keep getting defensive over sh*t I didn't say. That fits in perfectly with the topic of this thread.

[pennydreadful]

Originally Posted by Cure

No, working at a grocery store is failing pretty hard.

No, it isn't.

Originally Posted by Peanut

Good thing that wasn't my point at all and you've created this fake scenario wherein I denounce all retail employees as worthless human beings. Keep getting defensive over sh*t I didn't say. That fits in perfectly with the topic of this thread.

If that doesn't have anything to do with your point, why even bring up their job at all? Why not just complain about people with egos and leave their jobs out of it? You specifically used the term "dead end job" and "gofer" in conjunction with discussing people who are enormous failures - so yeah, it came off like you were being really judgmental.

If you weren't, fine - but you can say so in a way that doesn't involve spraying your bile all over me. My response was perfectly polite, and there's absolutely no need to be rude and aggressive in response. I don't know what your problem is but don't take it out on me - I have just as much right to be here and voice my opinions as you.

jesus christ, this place.

[Netkeeper]

Yeah really, what the hell? No need to get so angry when Penny was agreeing with your overall message there.

[Peanut]

Originally Posted by pennydreadful

Why not just complain about people with egos and leave their jobs out of it?

Because the fact that they have a sh*t job is part of my point? The specific person I was around today is a 40-something dead beat drunk who gets me coffee and occasionally passes me a screw, but he stands there and talks down to people and boasts loudly about how much he knows all day long. I was annoyed at work on a phone, so I wasn't going to make a giant post detailing the exact type of person I was talking about, nor the people I've dealt with in the past.

My point, more specifically, being that I've worked with a ton of people and for whatever reason the most useless of them tend to have the most overbearing of egos. This drunk sh*t I've worked with recently, the part-time stock boy who beat his ex and never paid child support, these types of people.

Originally Posted by Netkeeper

Yeah really, what the hell? No need to get so angry when Penny was agreeing with your overall message there.

What are you even talking about? Zero anger whatsoever. I type straightforward and to the point. If it bugs people that's on them to deal with it.

I don't even know why I posted in this thread. It's always the typical sh*t in here.

[CaliperCat]

Reading this thread today has made me feel as though I need to acquire a suit of armor before poking around here again.

[pennydreadful]

Yeah, the internet is literally this:





Sometimes you just have to laugh at how silly it gets!

[plastroncafe]

Crap, are we measuring people's worth by their source of income again? Dang, and I missed it.

[IndigoErth]

Originally Posted by Cure

No, working at a grocery store is failing pretty hard.

And that's some of the stupidness that is wrong with this/my country; maybe it is in multiple countries.

"Get a job!"
"Great, you have a job, but it's not good enough so I'll continue to look down on you!"


What's funny (not really) is seeing how we (me and coworkers) were treated when I worked at a large retailer. We were just a team that worked an evening shift dealing with the merchandise (mostly clothing, but some home stuff as well) and helping customers as needed.

Of course, we're just little retail employees, we aren't worth much I guess. Customers can be pretty disrespectful in both their attitude toward the employees and their own general behavior in the store. Even jerky managers would have an attitude as if we weren't worth much.

People treat workers as if, in their view, they are simply some lowly costumer assistant and is all they've ever made of themselves, never giving a thought to the fact that this was only a part-time evening job and that many, if not most, had other primary jobs.

I mean really, if people don't know someone's story then they shouldn't judge.

Case in point off the top of my head...

One frail looking woman I worked with also worked for the postal service. She delivered mail by day, six days a week, not by truck, but by foot, with a heavy bag across her shoulder. (Not to mention run-ins with dogs that do happen, etc.) And then some nights she'd come bust her ass at the store, which had a lot of walking and heavy carrying involved as well. I honestly do not think I could do that postal job ALL DAY and then even have it in me do the work we did at the store.

Another is a secretary at a lawyers office, teaches an Irish dance class for children, AND worked most evenings at the store after she was promoted to our Lead. She only left the retail job once she was fairly far into a pregnancy and needed to give it up.

Another was in her 80s, spent her younger years as a factory worker. When I knew her she lived alone (widowed), still mowed her own grass with a push mower. Was one of those great old folks with a sassy personality. She was a tough old thing that put the durability of us younger ones to shame; they don't make 'em like her generation anymore.

Don't make assumptions about a person's source of income... It may not be a job worthy of respect to some, but it's income and it's being productive; someone is needed to do that work so that the rest of the community can access what the business has to offer. And for all anyone knows, it may not even be their only job, some very well may be doing something "more impressive" at other hours of the day.

[snake]

I can't wait to start up my buisness and rake in millions.

[Lethal Lullaby]

One day I am going to snap...

[shuriken]

Originally Posted by Cure

No, working at a grocery store is failing pretty hard.

Its a failure if you let it be.
If someone is happy and making a decent living, all the while loving what they do then how can one objectively call another a failure.
I've had some bad jobs (a damn mascot for a radio station), and some good ones (rehabbing apartments).
My favorite job though no joke, has been a Jimmy John's delivery driver (on a bike). Why? I think its fun.
Hours are wonky (Overnights are 10pm to 5 am, once a month Friday and Saturday, sometimes I did doubles 10am to 10pm), Kinda dangerous (you will be hit by a car... deal with it) and I get 7 bucks an hour for biking anywhere in a mile radius delivering sandwiches to people who may or may not tip you in one of the most traffic heavy areas in Chicago.

I guess I try and make the best of it. I meet different people, got a date once, get exercise, decent sandwiches, and on a good day make $100 or more in tips.
It isn't glamorous, isn't cool or fancy but it helped finance my schooling, so eventually I can Architect to my hearts content. If that doesn't work out, I wouldn't say I have failed because I've acquired enough skills that I can do something else, be good and successful at it.

A thing that grinds my gears is people not appreciating what they have, feeling entitled about stuff. It bugs me man.

[ProactiveMan]

I long for the return of career retail. Shopping is a much more pleasant experience when the sales assistants/cashiers/clerks/storemen/managers are in it for the long hall, i.e skilled, invested and knowledgeable. You can't really expect someone on casual rates to give a crap beyond the basic requirements of the job. They get dicked around so much, and corporate retailers are so schizophrenic with hours, policies etc. that it doesn't pay to settle in.

My grandfather was a clerk and a storeman for his entire working life in an era when that was the norm. He was not a wealthy man, but you would never say he was a failure. He was well respected in the community he lived in, and that sounds like a good life to me.

Regarding egos...

I have a theory that people with seemingly huge egos develop them over time like a callus, as a defence against insecurity. Some people have a low opinion of themselves, or at least they worry that others have a low opinion of them, and so they overcompensate by projecting false confidence.

To someone who is not self confident, appearing as though you are feels like being in disguise behind enemy lines. You never know if people are on to you, and you are terrified that you may give yourself away. To some, this deception becomes second nature, and they may start believing it. When you catch egotists in their darker moments, you can often see their insecurities.