What Grinds Your Gears? :)

[BubblyShell22]

Sorry to hear about that, Leo. That's gotta suck and I don't know how you can deal with something like that. I'd say feel better, but I know that won't help.

[Leo656]

Eh, we all got our cross to bear, right? I'll manage. But thanks.

[Davetello]

Sorry to hear that Leo

At this stage I'm thinking that gunshot is the easiest method of killing oneself. Jumping off a skyscraper takes far too much guts, slitting wrists in the bath is a terrifying way to go, taking an overdose and being in agony for days doesn't sound appealing, and hanging by a rope as you slowly go blue doesn't seem enticing either.

With a gunshot (to the temple, otherwise you wind up like Ar seface) it's quick; BOOM, you're fvcking gone. It sucks for whoever finds you, of course, but from your perspective it's like flicking a switch.

Perhaps I should begin a topic: "favoured suicide method",

[Leo656]

Please don't?

I could never do that, man. I've only ever held a gun once and frankly I'm not into it. Like, literally, just holding it (it was my friend's Glock, not loaded, natch), I could almost feel a very real power just surging through it, and it kind of scared me. Maybe because it was just the one time; I've often thought about taking lessons and shooting just for fun, and maybe one day, but.. I'm NOT the kind of person that should own guns, I'm very irrational sometimes.

I'd f*ck it up. Like, As I was pulling the trigger I know I'd get scared and my finger would slip and I'd screw it up. Absolutely certain of it. Nah.

Ultimately I don't and have never REALLY wanted to die, it's just that feeling you get when you think things have been bad for too long and they're never going to improve and the idea of carrying the same thing for another 40+ years is too much to bear. But on the whole my Up days far outnumber my Down. I don't think anyone really wants to end it, they just want Hope, and PROOF that things will improve.

Tough part is, you can't just get those things at the corner store, and some folks run out of patience. But nah, I'm in a good place right now, this illness notwithstanding. It'll pass.

[Davetello]

I would probably pull the trigger if I had a gun to hand. But, I wouldn't even have the slightest clue of how to acquire a weapon. This isn't the United States where any crackpot can get their hands on a gun, over here it's much, much harder. I don't think I've ever even seen a real gun in person

But yeah, you're essentially right. Nobody really wants to die. But you eventually get to the point why you wonder why you're even bothering. Life is just one long massive pain in the sack, and those fleeting moments of joy and rare transcendent events just don't compensate. You say others think "I can't take another 40 or 50 years of this". The thing that keeps me going is knowing that in 50 years I will probably be gone anyway. Imagine they created an immortality serum and we were all forced to take it. Now that would be a nightmare.

But yeah. I do wanna live. It's just that I don't want to live my current life, and I'm growing really impatient.

[BubblyShell22]

Originally Posted by Leo656

Eh, we all got our cross to bear, right? I'll manage. But thanks.

Aint' that the truth? But no problem. Always like to try and cheer people up if possible.

Dave, I hear you about life and how it's hard, but I don't think I'd ever want to end it voluntarily because I just think about how I've actually got a lot of life left. I'd rather just die of old age than taking it on my own, and I probably wouldn't have the courage to do it anyway. But I can understand why some feel that way.

[Davetello]

I get ya Shell.

I'm having regrets as well. I wish I'd have tried harder to become a pro footballer. I wish I'd have actually been able to go through with uni aged 18. I wish I wouldn't have fvcked up every personal relationship I ever had, platonic or otherwise.

I feel like I didn't enjoy my twenties; most of my peers feel similarly. I know because I asked them. And the worst part? I can't see anything really changing, so in ten years I will be 42 and claiming that I didn't enjoy my thirties. And so the cycle continues.

[BubblyShell22]

Yeah, it sucks. It sucks that I graduated and then the economy took a sh*t so I wasn't able to get a job because of it. Plus the fact that nowadays you have to have certain experiences to get a job and the fact that I don't drive which would screw me out of anything anyway unless I lived in the city. So forget it. That's why I want a work at home job, but with all the drama going on in my house and the constant fighting, it would be hard for me to even get any work done.

[Davetello]

I think the key is to accept that life sucks, and not try to delude ourselves that things will get better for us. It's so hard to finally give up and accept our fate, though. Inside I want to keep trying.

[BubblyShell22]

Or that it may get better for us but it's a long drawn out process that doesn't happen overnight. That's the way I see it.

[Davetello]

Problem is that it's an internal thing, for me at least. Circumstances certainly don't help but changing my environment won't solve what's going on inside me. No amount of material gain, social mobility or relationship building can fix my problems.

You can take the boy out of the hole, but you can't take the hole out of the boy.

[BubblyShell22]

Yeah for some people it may not happen, but I'm the type to just live day to day and know that eventually it may get better in the long run. And if it doesn't, then the heck with it.

[Davetello]

Yes, my psychologist told me not to worry about the future, to live in the present. I've tried but it's impossible.

[snake]

I always think about the future, because I have BIG plans.

[Davetello]

Originally Posted by snake

I always think about the future, because I have BIG plans.

Alright snakester? How's it going?

At your age you really should be full of ambition and excitement

[snake]

Originally Posted by Davetello

Alright snakester? How's it going?

At your age you really should be full of ambition and excitement

The present sucks anyways. I really want to get a job already.

[Leo656]

At that age most of my Big Plans involved which of my female classmates I'd be thinking about in the shower once I got home from school.

But uh, yeah, no, it's good to plan ahead.

[Davetello]

Originally Posted by snake

The present sucks anyways. I really want to get a job already.

Me too

Originally Posted by Leo656

At that age most of my Big Plans involved which of my female classmates I'd be thinking about in the shower once I got home from school.

But uh, yeah, no, it's good to plan ahead.

Big being the operative word.

[Davetello]

Portmanteaus of celebrity names. Like "Brangelina".

How did this begin and why weren't the instigators executed by lethal injection?

[Leo656]

Brother, don't get me started...