The Thread Dedicated to Terrible, Horrible, Down Right Crappy Movies

[Jester]

As the title states this thread is dedicated to the films make you cringe. A thread for the likes of Gigli, anything by Ed Wood and Abraxas. (If you've never heard of the last one, then count yourself lucky, let's just say Jesse Ventura, Terminator Rip-off, and fight scenes with smooth jazz background music.)

To kick things off, here's an ad for a movie I'm sure would be a proud addition to this list. As some of you know I work behind the video counter at work on occasion, and we get a movie guide with the release schedules and ads for new movies. Along with ads for numerous sequels (Saw III, Open Water 2, because the first one was soooo good, and Walking Tall 2, with Kevin Sorbo replacing Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson) and the other crap came this gem, and by gem I mean steaming pile of excrement. What makes it all the worse is it stars actual known actors (but I guess so did Plan Nine, with Bella Lugosi, and several of the other crap films I have in my collection). Here it is: Devil's Den.

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y13...g?t=1168837778
(The Tagline says it all: "The final battle for the soul of mankind will be fought IN A BAR FULL OF POSSESSED STRIPPERS!")

I couldn't help but laugh as I read the synopsis. If it's too small I'll type it here:

Originally Posted by Devil's Den Ad

During a routine Spanish-Fly trip back from Mexico, 2 friends stumble upon an out-of-the-way gentleman's club with no cover charge and plenty of sexy, friendly ladies. (with a first sentence like that, this movies bound to be gold...did I mention it's DtV?) But what feels like lap dance heaven (oh, I get it...it's a pun. Cause the strippers are possessed. Get it! Get it? You don't get it!) is actually a recruiting station for an army of the flesh eating undead. (Oh...it gets better) Now a drug-dealing film geek (what a combo) (Devon Sawa), a trigger happy assassin (Kelly Hu), and a samurai demon hunter (does he hunt samurai demons, or is he a samurai who hunts demons....ow my brain hurts.) (Ken Foree) and a airhead cocktail waitress (Karen Maxwell) must battle ferocious hordes of (oh this is gold! The person who wrote this synopsis has got to do my PR sometime) gut-ripping strippers whose pimp-daddy is Satan himself. FHM and Deal or No Deal model Dawn Olivieri co-stars in this skin-baring (that explains the crap plot...it's all about the sex ) bloodbath where (get ready...) the horny meets the horned, beautiful women can be soul-sucking ghouls, and every man's road to Hell leads straight into DEVIL'S DEN.

Ahhh...that sounds like a winner. I'd consider watching it to laugh at just how bad it is, but I'm sure mommy wouldn't approve of some of the content.