Anchor Turtle: The legend of Michaelangelo

Spawn Guy · 01-02-2007, 03:42 PM

There was a time, a time before cable, when the local anchorman
reigned supreme, when people believed everything they heard on TV.

This was an age when only men were allowed to read the news.And in San Diego, one anchorman was more man than the rest.

His name was Michaelangelo.

He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals.

He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr. And suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo.In other words, Michaelangelo was the balls.
"Mmm. I look good. I mean, really good."

"Hey, everyone! Come and see how good I look!"

"Mm, ehh, mm. Ribs. I had ribs for lunch. That's why I'm doing this."

"How are you? You look awfully nice tonight. Hmm? Maybe don't wear a bra next time. No, I was talking to you. No, not her.I don't know her name. What is it? Lanolin? La-lanolin? Like sheep's wool?"

"Mm, I love Scotch. I love Scotch. Scotchy, Scotch, Scotch. Here it goes down. Down into my belly. Mm-mm-mm."

Spawn Guy · 01-02-2007, 04:06 PM

When the clock struck six, it meant one thing
for Michaelangelo and his news team: Go time.

"Channel Six News,with five-time Emmy award-winning anchor Michaelangelo."

"Raphael, sports."

Donatello, weather.

"And your reporter in the field, Leonardo."

"It's Channel Six News at Four."
Yes, these fellas were a real news team.Mikey, of course, was the foundation, the rock. But each member brought their own special something to the equation.

"People call me the Leo-man. I'm the stylish one of the group. I know what you're asking yourself, and the answer is yes, I have a nickname for my penis. It's called the Octagon. But I also nicknamed my testes. My left one is James Westfall, and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right, you might get to meet the whole gang."

"Raph here. I'm all about havin' fun. You know, get a couple of cocktails in me, start a fire in someone's kitchen, maybe go to SeaWorld, take my pants off. Anyway, I've become kind of famous for my signature catchphrase, "Whammy!" As in, "Gene Tenace at the plate...aaaaaaaaaaaand WHAMMY!"

"I'm Donatello. People seem to like me because I am polite and I'm rarely late. I like to eat ice cream, and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an IQ of 46, and am what some people call "mentally retarded."

*discordiatookie* · 01-02-2007, 08:16 PM

*Kunoichi_Haruko* · 01-02-2007, 08:49 PM

Spawn Guy, that was hilarious. Please tell me there's more coming. Please!

01-02-2007, 03:42 PM	#1
Spawn Guy Mad Scientist Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Earth 616 Posts: 1,481	Anchor Turtle: The legend of Michaelangelo There was a time, a time before cable, when the local anchorman reigned supreme, when people believed everything they heard on TV. This was an age when only men were allowed to read the news.And in San Diego, one anchorman was more man than the rest. His name was Michaelangelo. He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals. He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr. And suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo.In other words, Michaelangelo was the balls. "Mmm. I look good. I mean, really good." "Hey, everyone! Come and see how good I look!" "Mm, ehh, mm. Ribs. I had ribs for lunch. That's why I'm doing this." "How are you? You look awfully nice tonight. Hmm? Maybe don't wear a bra next time. No, I was talking to you. No, not her.I don't know her name. What is it? Lanolin? La-lanolin? Like sheep's wool?" "Mm, I love Scotch. I love Scotch. Scotchy, Scotch, Scotch. Here it goes down. Down into my belly. Mm-mm-mm." __________________ *THE TECHNODROME'S LITTLE YELLOW BOX LOVER* madpiratebunny (19:26:51): oh goodness, I've got an idea SpawnGuyThing (19:26:57): Do tell madpiratebunny (19:27:02): nononono madpiratebunny (19:27:05): no telling SpawnGuyThing (19:27:10): ... SpawnGuyThing (19:27:27): But I'm the imaginery friend you always wanted SpawnGuyThing (19:27:36): Your supposed to tell me everything

01-02-2007, 04:06 PM	#2
Spawn Guy Mad Scientist Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Earth 616 Posts: 1,481	When the clock struck six, it meant one thing for Michaelangelo and his news team: Go time. "Channel Six News,with five-time Emmy award-winning anchor Michaelangelo." "Raphael, sports." Donatello, weather. "And your reporter in the field, Leonardo." "It's Channel Six News at Four." Yes, these fellas were a real news team.Mikey, of course, was the foundation, the rock. But each member brought their own special something to the equation. "People call me the Leo-man. I'm the stylish one of the group. I know what you're asking yourself, and the answer is yes, I have a nickname for my penis. It's called the Octagon. But I also nicknamed my testes. My left one is James Westfall, and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right, you might get to meet the whole gang." "Raph here. I'm all about havin' fun. You know, get a couple of cocktails in me, start a fire in someone's kitchen, maybe go to SeaWorld, take my pants off. Anyway, I've become kind of famous for my signature catchphrase, "Whammy!" As in, "Gene Tenace at the plate...aaaaaaaaaaaand WHAMMY!" "I'm Donatello. People seem to like me because I am polite and I'm rarely late. I like to eat ice cream, and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an IQ of 46, and am what some people call "mentally retarded." __________________ *THE TECHNODROME'S LITTLE YELLOW BOX LOVER* madpiratebunny (19:26:51): oh goodness, I've got an idea SpawnGuyThing (19:26:57): Do tell madpiratebunny (19:27:02): nononono madpiratebunny (19:27:05): no telling SpawnGuyThing (19:27:10): ... SpawnGuyThing (19:27:27): But I'm the imaginery friend you always wanted SpawnGuyThing (19:27:36): Your supposed to tell me everything

01-02-2007, 08:16 PM	#3
discordiatookie facehugger Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Aberdeen, Scotland Posts: 2,817	__________________ Oh Discordia! Charyou Tree! Come, Reap! Don't tell us to grow up and out of it I got my cloak and dagger in a bar room brawl You actually trying to read this tiny text? Damn, you're dedicated! This is all just for effect you know... original TMNT art collection

01-02-2007, 08:49 PM	#4
Kunoichi_Haruko A shell of a good hit! Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Richmond, Va. Posts: 1,685	Spawn Guy, that was hilarious. Please tell me there's more coming. Please! __________________