Physical and mental health thread

[CyberCubed]

I hate big dogs too. Can't say I have a fear of them but I purposely don't walk near them while I'm on the street.

[Kanon]

Originally Posted by CyberCubed

I hate big dogs too. Can't say I have a fear of them but I purposely don't walk near them while I'm on the street.

For me it´s even worse.....
I don´t like big dogs (or dogs generally), buuuut all dogs I met want to play with me, or they want to lick my arms with their ridiculous large tongues.

One thing that bothers me is, that I become thiner.
I am not losing weight (maybe my fat is now muscle mass ), but my jeans are too big now and it´s tiresome to buy new ones...

[CyberCubed]

I do not trust those huge dogs at all. Especially when you hear stories on the news of a 5 year old boy who had his leg torn off by a dog owned by a neighbor.

Those huge dogs can snap at anytime and attack you if they think you're a threat. Protect any children from them at all costs.

[Prowler]

I'm kinda wary of dogs as well. When I was younger I used to even cross to the other side of the street to avoid walking past one, especially if it wasn't on the leash. I sorta overcame that problem and have no problem walking past most of them now since the most they usually do is smell your pants/legs. Btw, small dogs tend to be more aggressive than big dogs from my experience. But yea, I'm not trusting a Dobberman or a Rottweiler. Especially since their owners tend to be aggressive looking burly guys who most likely just got them for status and self-defense. People who view animals as weapons should have their pets taken away from them, imo. And even small dogs, it blows my mind when I see someone walking a Pittbull and unleashing it in a public garden full of families. They love to go on and on how Pittbulls aren't naturally aggressive but notice how every dog owner tends to say that their dog is harmless.

Other than a slight wariness of dogs, I don't really have any phobia. I do tend to OCD about irrelevant things more than I should, though. Strangely, it's harder to beat such habits than one thinks. When I was a kid, I used to wash my hands quite often.

[Netkeeper]

Hi health thread, what do you do when you want to admit yourself to the ER and you have no hospital in your town

I hate myself lol

[pennydreadful]

Hey Net - hope you're doing ok. *hugs*

I suppose I should add my two cents in the thread; as I've mentioned, my depression's acting up a little bit (for the first time since I started a medication that actually worked for me... so around two years or so). Hence why I'm not posting as much as usual.

I meant to go to the doctor this weekend but stuff's gotten busy so I'll have to reschedule for another couple of weeks - hopefully the doc will either increase my meds, or give me something that'll combine with it to give my system a bit of a kick in the ass.

In the meantime, I've quit all alcohol and caffeine for a while, I'm trying to get more sunlight and exercise as well as trying to keep a lid on my sugar intake, cuz I just feel tired, irritable and flat over absolutely nothing yet still can't sleep well.

Of course, what's most annoying is the fact that the meds I'm on already have a negative affect on my physical libido as it is (mental libido never quits on me!!) - so increasing my dose or adding something to it is just going to make it worse. Which I know seems like a petty thing to complain about, but I'm 30 years old and I resent not having the kind of physical sex drive which I know I have when I don't take medication.

It could be worse, I mean, I've been far more depressed than this - it's just that I have this huge fear of the illness coming back full strength and ending up where I was a few years ago.

[Netkeeper]

I'm doing a bit better since I posted that, but lately, it just seems like my depressive moods have gotten more frequent and more intense as time goes on. All I can do is sit around and wait and it's taking a huge toll on me. I just wish I could do something. Anything.

[Electric]

sorry to hear about all this net and penny

penny, the fact that youre dropping alcohol/caffiene and getting some sun and excercise is great. from anything ive read or heard excercise is a great way to help with depression, as it also makes you healthier too

[pennydreadful]

Thanks, Electric.

Net, are you able to at least see a doctor and see whether they can give you something to get over the rough patch?

[Leofan26]

I have seizures, they are uncontrollable right now and I've had them my whole life since I was a baby. Matter of fact I almost died from one when I was a baby, they are hard to deal with at times.

Some people have only one type of seizure, my brains filled with different types and is active with them daily and night time too. I even have some in my sleep, my body acts different when they are over, my body tends to shut down and takes a while to heal so I have to sleep it off a bit in order get on with my life.

Thing about seizures, they can also cause my emotions to go nuts a at times, mostly depression.

Over all, that's what I have to live with every day pretty much. I'll have rare days that I don't have any.

I'm not the only one that has these, many people do. Just like I said, different types, some could have more than one type or just one. I knew one girl or saw it on TV who'd have one every second and a hard time living.

[pennydreadful]

Sorry to hear that Leo - that must be really hard for you.

[Netkeeper]

I don't know what happened to me.

I was doing wonderfully a few minutes ago. As soon as I shut the door to my room I suddenly started feeling completely awful and once again pining for a doctor. I think I'm getting worse -- I want to cry but I can't will myself to even do that. My physical body hardly feels attached any more. I don't feel anything but a downward sort of sadness. It's almost like I'm on a drug right now, except I'm not. I feel like a lost, hopeless cause, and that I'll never truly be fixed and I'll end up dead soon, but I can't make myself care enough about it to cry.

Of course this has to happen when everyone in my house is asleep and I can't ask for any help.

[Mona_Lisa]

Originally Posted by Netkeeper

I don't know what happened to me.

I was doing wonderfully a few minutes ago. As soon as I shut the door to my room I suddenly started feeling completely awful and once again pining for a doctor. I think I'm getting worse -- I want to cry but I can't will myself to even do that. My physical body hardly feels attached any more. I don't feel anything but a downward sort of sadness. It's almost like I'm on a drug right now, except I'm not. I feel like a lost, hopeless cause, and that I'll never truly be fixed and I'll end up dead soon, but I can't make myself care enough about it to cry.

Of course this has to happen when everyone in my house is asleep and I can't ask for any help.

You gotta have faith, Faith in yourself. You are not a hopeless cause. Your a person of value and you are here for a reason. Don't will yourself to die, fight. And if you need to seek help, do so. Don't be ashamed!

[Leo656]

I feel ya. Me and the wife had another blow-up. Honestly? I'd like to bring the whole place down in flames and send us both to f*cking Hell. Nobody will ever convince me life is worth living. Every single day, when I'm falling asleep, I think to myself, "Man, I hope I don't wake up." But I always do. If it wasn't her it'd be something else.

I don't want to get too deep into it like last time. I just wish I was never born or wasn't such a coward so I could just finish it myself already. It's not going to get better, and I know that. Sick of trying.

Started typing a long letter to my sister that's morphing into what would be a pretty amazing suicide note. If it comes to that, I'll be sure and pass it around before I go. Heavily weighing all options right this moment. Everyone's asleep but me. It would be perfect.

I don't want to talk about why. I just want to make everything stop. I never asked for any of this. Being here. I curse every day. Things get so bad so fast, and stay that way. There's pills right over there, but I'm scared I won't take enough. I don't even know what they do. I heard you just go to sleep, but how would anyone know, really? I don't want to come back, if I go. Just disappear.

I probably won't. Coward. Just keep pretending to live. I promise, if I go, today, tomorrow, whenever, I will say goodbye first. You all deserve to read the letter, at least. It's almost beautiful. And I've put you through a lot. I know that. You deserve to understand, if/when.

Sorry for this. I am. I'm just broken. I truly believe that people who were not meant to be here are made that way, broken. As was made clear to me many times, I was not meant to be here. They told me so. Over and over again. Maybe that's why I'm broken. Made that way. Makes sense.

[pennydreadful]

Net and Leo656 - I know it seems like the most pointless thing you could do right now, and fighting back against this big black cr*ppy cloud in your head is the last thing you feel like doing - but hang on, even if it hurts.

I understand how you both feel. It's ok to not feel ok, guys. You don't have to walk around with a big smile when you're feeling rotten. You're both great people who are just going through a lot of sh*t right now, and that doesn't make you bad people, it doesn't make you hopeless and it doesn't make you irreparably broken.

And hey, it's ok to have a few cracks here and there. You know why? Because those cracks are part of what makes you the person that you are right now, and that person is not someone to be ashamed of.



You are good, interesting, funny people - and you deserve to be happy. You are absolutely worthwhile, and you are already good enough.



If you need me, please PM me ok? If you need to see a doctor, or call someone - please do. Depression is an illness, just like diabetes or asthma. If you were diabetic and you were having a low blood sugar attack, you'd get the help you needed to feel better. It's the same thing with depression - it doesn't make you weak or defective to ask for help, and you DO deserve it, no matter what that voice inside your head is telling you. You deserve help, you deserve happiness and you deserve to be loved.

Leo, you're not a failure, and you are more than the sum of your mistakes. Net, you're not a freak and you belong in this world as much as anybody else. You both only see flaws in yourselves - I see two special, unique, witty, intelligent, caring people who are different from other people and who I like specifically because of that. You're both really great people. I know you don't believe me, but I'm going to keep saying it until one day you realize it's true.

You aren't alone, even if it feels that way.

[Leo656]

"Red eyes...
Just keep my heart beating...
Your secret's safe with me...
Just drive...
I've broken our mirror
So our past won't look so tempting...

I never thought it'd feel this good to quit!
Failure tastes so sweet!
I'm not afraid anymore...
Forgive Me...

I'll swing here...
I'll hang from this rope...
Just at least until they've found me.
Stay close, dear...
The note on the floor says,
'I wish that you were here...'

I never thought it'd feel this good to quit!
Failure tastes so sweet!
I'm not afraid anymore...
Forgive Me...

So long to the future...
I never had a chance anyway!
So when I use my uses I get a problem with my brain...
This is a problem so intense
I cannot explain...
Over and over...
Which way to turn?!
There's no way out...
At this point I'm not concerned!

I never thought it'd feel this good to quit!
Failure tastes so sweet...
I'm not afraid anymore...
Forgive Me..."





I am in a very dark place.

[ZariusTwo]

Please find a light in life Leo, you're valued here greatly by a lot of us here. I was in the place you were in way back in 2010, where I met so many people on the brink of collapse, and it made me realize how much I wanted to stay and keep fighting for what I beleive in.

It has'nt been easy for me either these last few years, I'm more afraid of dogs than ever, I can't walk down the street to buy a magazine because I'm afraid of groups of people, kids especially because I don't trust them, I hate being inside a shop filled with comic books as it sends me into instant feelings of resentment and anxiety attacks. Even last night I had trouble with a friend with OCD who does'nt like sitting through the end credits of a movie and he made a bit of a scene, and I did'nt know how to take it.

I know this does'nt exactly sound like a pick-me-up, but trust me I'm getting to the point...

There are terrible people in terrible posistions and it angers me every day that most people are so low in standard and weak that they allow those jerks to be succcesful at what they do even if they do nothing but abuse their power, but they don't win, because somewhere in some bright corner of life, there exists options. Every so often I find places, communities, where every word I've said against that sort of system is vindicated, I am not alone, you are not alone, none of us are alone, we can be brought together on many a fun topic, focus on the light-hearted irreverency of life rather than the futile side of it.

[Leo656]

Trying to stay distracted in idle chatter.

[ZariusTwo]

Originally Posted by Leo656

Trying to stay distracted in idle chatter.

In Scotland we call that a "blether"

[Leo656]

I'm Irish. We say, "F*ck Scotland."

Nah, nah, just clownin' dawg. We good, playa, we good.

I needed some yuks today.