"And then the murders began."

[IndigoErth]

Inspired by this article titled

Improve any novel by changing its second line to “And then the murders began”

http://www.avclub.com/article/improv...and-the-251576

And it works especially good with kid's books! Here's a couple I threw together.


From (2003) TMNT book "Tricks and Treats":

April opened her apartment door, letting in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And then the murders began.

From a version of Henny Penny/Chicken Little:

One day Henny Penny was out in the barnyard pecking for corn when all of a sudden, something hit her on the head. Then the murders began.

[Utrommaniac]

Honestly, this was the only contribution I can think of.

Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically knocking people's hats off—then, I account it high time to get to sea as soon as I can. This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws himself upon his sword; I quietly take to the ship. There is nothing surprising in this. If they but knew it, almost all men in their degree, some time or other, cherish very nearly the same feelings towards the ocean with me.

And then the murders began

[TheSkeletonMan939]

On the 15th of May, in the Jungle of Nool, in the heat of the day, in the cool of the pool, he was splashing, enjoying the jungle's great joys, when Horton the elephant heard a small noise. And then the murders began.

... I guess Horton heard a voice that was telling him to kill.

[DestronMirage22]

The sounds echoed, deep and heavy, thudding in her chest like death's metronome. And then the murders began.

[Utrommaniac]

Now Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let’s go out to the field.” While they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him. And then the murders began.

Or "And that's how murders began"???

[plastroncafe]

The man in black fled across the desert, and the Gunslinger followed.
And then the murders began.

Or my other favorite.

"My name is Leonardo."
And then the murders began.

[Utrommaniac]

To Mrs. Saville, England
St. Petersburgh, Dec. 11th, 17—
You will rejoice to hear that no disaster has accompanied the commencement of an enterprise which you have regarded with such evil forebodings. I arrived here yesterday, and my first task is to assure my dear sister of my welfare and
increasing confidence in the success of my undertaking.

But then the murders began...

I mean...it's not entirely wrong...

[IndigoErth]

All good, but that Horton one just killed me. (Pun intended I guess? lol)

[Utrommaniac]

Once an angry man dragged his father along the ground through his own orchard. "Stop!" cried the groaning old man at last, "Stop! I did not drag my father beyond this tree."
And then the murders began

I just searched "classic book openings" and this is one that seemed...entirely appropriate. That does seem like a reasonable place for murders to start.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. And then the murders began.

(Opening to Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)

[Utrommaniac]

I almost considered the Gone with the Wind opening, but it goes on too long about her pretty appearance (even though it literally starts with "Scarlett O'Hara was not beautiful").

So, instead

Rumo was good at fighting. At the beginning of his story, however, he had no inkling of this, nor did he know that he was a Wolperting and would one day become Zamonia's most illustrious hero. He had no name, nor did he have the faintest recollection of his parents. He didn't know where he came from or where he would go. All he knew was that the farmyard where he grew up was his kingdom. And then the murders began.

Gruesome, gruesome murders...Rumo's a great book and I haven't read it in years, nor the other Zamonia stories. But I want to!

[TurtleWA]

(From Goodnight Moon)

In the great green room
there was a telephone
And a red balloon
And a picture of--

The cow jumping over the moon

and there were three little bears, sitting on chairs

and two little kittens and a pair of mittens

and a little toy house and a young mouse

and a comb and a brush and bowl full of mush

and a quiet old lady who was whispering "hush"

Spoiler:

And then the murders began

[DarkFell]

This is from Freaky Fred's Poem. I thought that it would go good with this game.

You can read the poem as it was heard from an episode of Courage The Cowardly Dog, that was simply titled Freaky Fred, in the link below. http://casinovasvictory.deviantart.c...Poem-252155575

Barbara, my love was named,

and her fair hair, a mane untamed,

until one evening, I'm ashamed,

I got a little... naughty.


The look upon my young love's face,

was sweet as lace,

but in this case,

I realized she... needed space.

And then ...the murders began.

[Candy Kappa]

3 May. Bistritz.--Left Munich at 8:35 P.M., on 1st May, arriving at Vienna early next morning; should have arrived at 6:46, but train was an hour late. And then the murders began.

[MsMarvelDuckie]

That was from Dracula wasn't it? Sounds familiar.

[Candy Kappa]

Yup, thought it was fitting.

[Original TMNT Cartoon Fan]

It was a dark and stormy night. And then the murders began.

[Utrommaniac]

Every Who Down in Whoville Liked Christmas a lot...But the Grinch,Who lived just north of Whoville, Did NOT!
And then the murders began

[FredWolfLeonardo]

Many strange legends occur in these jungles of India
But none so strange as the story of the young boy named Mowgli
It all began when the silence of the Jungle was broken by an unfamiliar sound
And then the murders began.

[Utrommaniac]

This is the story of the great war that Rikki-tikki-tavi fought single-handed, through the bath-rooms of the big bungalow in Segowlee cantonment. And then the murders began.

(Basically exactly how I feel about R-T-T. Just the first two thirds of Beowulf with animals, featuring British Imperialist propaganda. Stop saying it's a story about "courage")