The Ninja Security Advisor

ForSquirtleMyNurtle · 11-06-2003, 04:06 AM

I have a theory that Condoleezza Rice (George Bush's National Security Advisor) is a Ninja Turtle. She totally has a snout like Donatello. Can this be? She probably had her shell removed and changed her name to Condoleezza because Condoleezztello was too obvious. This probably also means that the real Turtles are also Right Wing Republicans. This is really a bad sign over all.

Also, has anyone else pondered the legality of Turtles running for political office? I have always thought Leonardo would make an excellent Governor of New York.

~~Jarrah White~~ · 11-06-2003, 06:26 AM

You left out Venus de Milo.

**GK Punk** · 11-06-2003, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jarrah White

You left out Venus de Milo.

No he didn't.

(She dosn't exsist anymore! Like when Glen Jacobs played the Isac Yankem character!)

~~Pizza Face~~ · 11-06-2003, 09:20 AM

This is a great question. I have thought alot about turtles and politics. concerning question 1: I don't know if Rice is a turtle, but could be. The turtles have been known to wear rubber masks and people never get wise to it. Question 2: I believe that a ninja turtle could very well run for office. As for president, we would have to find out what country the turtles came from when they were pets. If they were born in say Cananda, than no go. But if they were born in Pennshellvania, then yes as they are natural born citizens. I don't know enough about the politics of New York, but I think Donatello would make an excellent mayor of Bozeman, mt. He has got just the right amount of elbow grease and know how to fix the traffic problem on main and 19th. To Grunger Kitty: Venus De Milo has got to be one of THE lamest turtle ideas ever. I mean a GIRL turtle? plus, how did the mutagen get to china? And it just happened to land on a turtle. And how did she learn to be a ninja? That is japan. She would do kung-fu or something. And if she spoke English, she would have a chinese accent.

**Kali** · 11-06-2003, 09:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pizza Face

Venus De Milo has got to be one of THE lamest turtle ideas ever. I mean a GIRL turtle? plus, how did the mutagen get to china? And it just happened to land on a turtle. And how did she learn to be a ninja? That is japan. She would do kung-fu or something. And if she spoke English, she would have a chinese accent.

1. She wasn't mutated in China, she was mutated in New York, and got taken to China afterwards.
2. She wasn't a ninja, she was a mystic. She knew martial arts, but it wasn't ninjutsu.
3. She did have a slight accent.

Cool theory, BTW, ForSquirtleMyNurtle.

*heretic888* · 11-06-2003, 10:22 AM

Quote:

She wasn't a ninja, she was a mystic.

Which the writers humorously mislabelled as a "shinobi" *snicker snicker ralph*.

For those of you that care, "shinobi" is just another pronounciation for the exact same kanji as the word "ninja"; i.e., different pronounciations for the same word. "Shinobi" is, in fact, the more historically accurate label, as "ninja" itself is a modern word invented within the last two centuries to refer to the warrior clans of Iga and Koga.

As for the political swing.... I doubt any of the turtles could legally run for any office, as they are not registered voters and do not legally "exist" in the first place....

UNLESS, of course, you are referring to the current Mirage storyline, in which the TMNT are posing as "aliens", in which case they definitely couldn't run. At least not for president.

I think Don would be the most interested in running for office. Raph I don't even see as a possibility. Mike and Leo are both possibilities, too, but Leo probably less so because he doesn't strike me as much of a people person that great at diplomacy.

Mike would probably have the best shot out of all of them because of his personal charm and charisma. He also seems like he has the most 'heart' out of the four of them, which would register in many people's minds.

Laterz.

**GK Punk** · 11-06-2003, 10:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by heretic888

Quote:

She wasn't a ninja, she was a mystic.

Which the writers humorously mislabelled as a "shinobi" *snicker snicker ralph*.

For those of you that care, "shinobi" is just another pronounciation for the exact same kanji as the word "ninja"; i.e., different pronounciations for the same word. "Shinobi" is, in fact, the more historically accurate label, as "ninja" itself is a modern word invented within the last two centuries to refer to the warrior clans of Iga and Koga.

Yeah, that was my biggest problem with them calling her a Shinobi. the one of the few eps I saw had her saying; "I am not a Ninja, I am Shinobi."
-_-

But other than that, You must get so sick of having to defend that series Kali. I know the feeling I have to do it with a series I like over at paradigm-city.

*heretic888* · 11-06-2003, 10:31 AM

Quote:

But other than that, You must get so sick of having to defend that series Kali. I know the feeling I have to do it with a series I like over at paradigm-city.

I think she's defending the ideas behind the series, moreso than the actual series itself.

*That Matt Guy* · 11-06-2003, 10:34 AM

Condoleeza Rice?

Huh???

**GK Punk** · 11-06-2003, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by heretic888

Quote:

But other than that, You must get so sick of having to defend that series Kali. I know the feeling I have to do it with a series I like over at paradigm-city.

I think she's defending the ideas behind the series, moreso than the actual series itself.

Yeah, but you know what I mean.

**Kali** · 11-06-2003, 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by grunger_kittie

But other than that, You must get so sick of having to defend that series Kali. I know the feeling I have to do it with a series I like over at paradigm-city.

Heh, not really. I'm not trying to convince people that the show was "good" because it certainly wasn't. But people seem so prejudice towards it, refusing to see anything good in it. But I'm not going to go into it here, because it's not the topic.

I'll be stepping out now, as I have not thoughts on politics (other than the fact that what's going on is a world away from what I learn in government class.

)

*Jephael* · 11-06-2003, 11:18 AM

I liked the 5th Turtle concept for Next Mutation, but I couldn't stand those weird villians.

On topic, I voted for Mikey.

~~Pizza Face~~ · 11-06-2003, 11:23 AM

I think the original question was the most interesting. It looks like we can all agree that venus is stupid. What about politics and the turtles?

*XERO* · 11-06-2003, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jephael

I liked the 5th Turtle concept for Next Mutation, but I couldn't stand those weird villians.

Maybe if I was the 5th Turtle, the show would've had a second season.

Anyway, I vote Raph.

*Duke* · 11-06-2003, 03:52 PM

I think Leo's leadership skills gives him the edge.

*heretic888* · 11-06-2003, 06:36 PM

But... THE POINT IS.... Mike would prolly be the best leader.

**Machias Banshee** · 11-06-2003, 09:25 PM

Okay...thread Split, and my personal opinion is...

Leo: good leadership skills, but too uptight..

Raph: Dictator-ish at times? who knows...

Don: Smart, good diplomatic relations, but maybe a lil too shy?

Mike: Hehehe, welcome to the USPAR_TAY!!!!

ForSquirtleMyNurtle · 11-07-2003, 02:26 AM

I am happy that you have all added your thoughts on this pressing matter. I am also glad that Don has pulled ahead in the race. Here is my personal rundown:

Leonardo: Obviously a good executive but very uptight. He would be like Al Gore. This is bad.
Raphael: Might be fun but could never win. His red bandana betrays his socialist sympathies.
Michaelangelo: like Bush before he quit doing coke. Would be lots of fun but whose gonna clean up the mess?
Donatello: great at fixing problems, works well with others, and is super smart. He's my vote all the way.

As far as Venus de Milo is concerned: Pizza Face is dumb to say that there shouldn't be a girl turtle. I mean, I think turtles can change sex.

Meira-Bates · 11-07-2003, 07:22 AM

I voted Donatello...why? Well Leo would be a very close second since he's already a leader type and all, but I think Donatello would have a better grasp on how to keep track of things. However, if we were to elect the other turtles in as other offices as well, Leo would be best in my opinion, but since that wasn't a part of the question, I just voted Donny.

~~Jarrah White~~ · 11-29-2003, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ForSquirtleMyNurtle

I have a theory that Condoleezza Rice (George Bush's National Security Advisor) is a Ninja Turtle. She totally has a snout like Donatello. Can this be? She probably had her shell removed and changed her name to Condoleezza because Condoleezztello was too obvious. This probably also means that the real Turtles are also Right Wing Republicans. This is really a bad sign over all.

Also, has anyone else pondered the legality of Turtles running for political office? I have always thought Leonardo would make an excellent Governor of New York.

I doubt Donatello would get a sex-change. Maybe Shredder wanted revenge on Venus, took one of Dr. Malignus's mind-control bugs and place it on Venus. Then removed her shell, changed her name to Condoleezza Rice and sold her to the Bush Administration, his price, the Iraqi oil.

View Poll Results: Which Ninja Turtle Would YOU Vote for?
Leonardo	7	36.84%
Donatello	8	42.11%
Raphael	1	5.26%
Michaelangelo	3	15.79%
Voters: 19. You may not vote on this poll

11-06-2003, 04:06 AM	#1
ForSquirtleMyNurtle Random Punk Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Portland, OR Posts: 24	The Ninja Security Advisor I have a theory that Condoleezza Rice (George Bush's National Security Advisor) is a Ninja Turtle. She totally has a snout like Donatello. Can this be? She probably had her shell removed and changed her name to Condoleezza because Condoleezztello was too obvious. This probably also means that the real Turtles are also Right Wing Republicans. This is really a bad sign over all. Also, has anyone else pondered the legality of Turtles running for political office? I have always thought Leonardo would make an excellent Governor of New York.

11-06-2003, 09:20 AM	#4
~~Pizza Face~~ Banned Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Bozeman, Mt sewer system Posts: 43	turtle for president This is a great question. I have thought alot about turtles and politics. concerning question 1: I don't know if Rice is a turtle, but could be. The turtles have been known to wear rubber masks and people never get wise to it. Question 2: I believe that a ninja turtle could very well run for office. As for president, we would have to find out what country the turtles came from when they were pets. If they were born in say Cananda, than no go. But if they were born in Pennshellvania, then yes as they are natural born citizens. I don't know enough about the politics of New York, but I think Donatello would make an excellent mayor of Bozeman, mt. He has got just the right amount of elbow grease and know how to fix the traffic problem on main and 19th. To Grunger Kitty: Venus De Milo has got to be one of THE lamest turtle ideas ever. I mean a GIRL turtle? plus, how did the mutagen get to china? And it just happened to land on a turtle. And how did she learn to be a ninja? That is japan. She would do kung-fu or something. And if she spoke English, she would have a chinese accent.

11-06-2003, 11:18 AM	#12
Jephael That whack job behind you Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Carlisle, Pennsylvania Posts: 8,143	I liked the 5th Turtle concept for Next Mutation, but I couldn't stand those weird villians. On topic, I voted for Mikey. __________________ "I like it. Simple, but effective!" Raphael; The Mean Machines - 1988

11-06-2003, 11:23 AM	#13
~~Pizza Face~~ Banned Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Bozeman, Mt sewer system Posts: 43	Who cares about venus I think the original question was the most interesting. It looks like we can all agree that venus is stupid. What about politics and the turtles?

11-06-2003, 06:26 AM	#2
~~Jarrah White~~ Banned Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Sydney, Australia Posts: 2,394	You left out Venus de Milo.

11-06-2003, 10:34 AM	#9
That Matt Guy Honey Bunches Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Lone Star State Posts: 5,840	Condoleeza Rice? Huh???

11-06-2003, 03:52 PM	#15
Duke Mad Scientist Join Date: Dec 2002 Posts: 1,913	I think Leo's leadership skills gives him the edge.

11-06-2003, 06:36 PM	#16
heretic888 Foot Elite Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 3,344	ahem But... THE POINT IS.... Mike would prolly be the best leader. __________________ "Ninpo began as training to become a moral people and to learn to endure in whatever social condition one is in; to know and accept one's fate, and to live for human beings and all other creatures. The person who masters all of these is a Ninja." (Masaaki Hatsumi)

11-06-2003, 09:25 PM	#17
Machias Banshee Super Moderator Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 17,163	Okay...thread Split, and my personal opinion is... Leo: good leadership skills, but too uptight.. Raph: Dictator-ish at times? who knows... Don: Smart, good diplomatic relations, but maybe a lil too shy? Mike: Hehehe, welcome to the USPAR_TAY!!!!

11-07-2003, 02:26 AM	#18
ForSquirtleMyNurtle Random Punk Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Portland, OR Posts: 24	I am happy that you have all added your thoughts on this pressing matter. I am also glad that Don has pulled ahead in the race. Here is my personal rundown: Leonardo: Obviously a good executive but very uptight. He would be like Al Gore. This is bad. Raphael: Might be fun but could never win. His red bandana betrays his socialist sympathies. Michaelangelo: like Bush before he quit doing coke. Would be lots of fun but whose gonna clean up the mess? Donatello: great at fixing problems, works well with others, and is super smart. He's my vote all the way. As far as Venus de Milo is concerned: Pizza Face is dumb to say that there shouldn't be a girl turtle. I mean, I think turtles can change sex.

11-07-2003, 07:22 AM	#19
Meira-Bates Mad Scientist Join Date: May 2003 Location: an abandoned wearhouse Posts: 1,057	I voted Donatello...why? Well Leo would be a very close second since he's already a leader type and all, but I think Donatello would have a better grasp on how to keep track of things. However, if we were to elect the other turtles in as other offices as well, Leo would be best in my opinion, but since that wasn't a part of the question, I just voted Donny. __________________ I'm also the winner of the award for being least likely to receive an award! O.o