The Zombie Survival Guide....

*Brodie* · 03-27-2004, 09:21 AM

I ordered this book last night after seeing it in just about every comic shop around CNY. It's either the biggest joke or the most damned in depth survival guide for mythical creatures.

Check this out....

Top 10 Lessons for Surviving a Zombie Attack

1. Organize before they rise!
2. They feel no fear, why should you?
3. Use your head: cut off theirs.
4. Blades don’t need reloading.
5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair.
6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it.
7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.
8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!
9. No place is safe, only safer.

*damnhooligan* · 03-27-2004, 09:37 AM

I need one of these, if only to garnish my coffee table when my in-laws are over.

*Brodie* · 03-27-2004, 10:06 AM

I'm gonna use it for everything. I'll do exactly what it says, because...I mean..........It says "Guide" so it must be true, right?

*Skeletoncrew* · 03-27-2004, 12:55 PM

That's on my wishlist.

Of course, I don't see an important piece of advice there: Learn to use a gun BEFORE you need it.

*Brodie* · 03-27-2004, 12:58 PM

Well, people automatically know how to use all guns in a zombie situation.....See most zombie movies ever created....Some how some little priss girl knows how to use a glock or an assault rifle...Via House Of The Dead....

*Skeletoncrew* · 03-27-2004, 01:14 PM

Yeah, incredible isn't it? I was going to take a handgun course next month, but my school schedule is too busy. I'm putting it off until summer.

*damnhooligan* · 03-27-2004, 01:22 PM

Ah, summer is prime zombie season in these parts.

Meira-Bates · 03-27-2004, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brodie

Well, people automatically know how to use all guns in a zombie situation.....See most zombie movies ever created....Some how some little priss girl knows how to use a glock or an assault rifle...Via House Of The Dead....

-.- that's SO true. Some how I never noticed till you said so, but in movies and games (zombie or not) it seems that way a bit too oten. I'd like to learn how to use my sword myself. X.x Like they said...blades don't have to be reloaded.

*cqb101* · 03-27-2004, 02:13 PM

I must have that book. Brodie, where'd you order it?

*Brodie* · 03-27-2004, 02:18 PM

You can order it anywhere. But I got mine off Amazon for 7 bucks.

愛 · 03-27-2004, 04:37 PM

Those zombies be damn crazy! I should pick it up.

Shadow the hedgehog · 03-27-2004, 04:40 PM

Zombies. No match for me.

*cqb101* · 03-27-2004, 11:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brodie

You can order it anywhere. But I got mine off Amazon for 7 bucks.

Cool. I'll just ask my mom to order next time she gets something from amazon(which is like twice a week

)

*Kid Icarus* · 03-27-2004, 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadow the hedgehog

Zombies. No match for me.

Cept when there's 100 of them and they've taken your shoes and remots with red buttons on them.

.

*cqb101* · 03-27-2004, 11:48 PM

Quote:

Top 10 Lessons for Surviving a Zombie Attack

1. Organize before they rise!
2. They feel no fear, why should you?
3. Use your head: cut off theirs.
4. Blades don’t need reloading.
5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair.
6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it.
7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.
8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!
9. No place is safe, only safer.

Um, that's only 9 reasons.

Shadow the hedgehog · 03-27-2004, 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gwgtrunks

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadow the hedgehog

Zombies. No match for me.

Cept when there's 100 of them and they've taken your shoes and remots with red buttons on them.

.

Muahahahaha. They forgot to take my chaos emeralds! Muahahahaahahahahaha!

*Kid Icarus* · 03-27-2004, 11:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadow the hedgehog

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gwgtrunks

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shadow the hedgehog

Zombies. No match for me.

Cept when there's 100 of them and they've taken your shoes and remots with red buttons on them.

.

Muahahahaha. They forgot to take my chaos emeralds! Muahahahaahahahahaha!

Those too. And besides, we all know Sonic always get's 'em in the end... why not make life easier and hand 'em over?

*Wes* · 03-28-2004, 12:25 AM

Yeah, a pal of mine sent this book to me a few months ago -- I haven't finished it yet, but it's been a great read so far. I like to take it with me to read when I'm riding the Metro. I've gotten a lot of odd looks -- people tend to be kind of wary of a guy in a black trenchcoat with black boots and black-and-red anarchy laces, especially when he's reading a book with weapons on the cover and gun illustrations in the text -- but at least they leave me some space and don't plop their three-foot asses down next to me.

*Skeletoncrew* · 03-28-2004, 02:21 AM

Hah hah hah! Much like certain insects, Wes has developed protective markings that ward off unwanted contact.

Demonfox38 · 03-28-2004, 10:50 AM

This movie will give you a crash-course on killing zombies with guns . . .

Nothing says Zombie Smiting like a YMCA pool full of holy water!

03-27-2004, 09:21 AM	#1
Brodie Certified Teacher Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Bizarro Metropolis Posts: 6,495	The Zombie Survival Guide.... I ordered this book last night after seeing it in just about every comic shop around CNY. It's either the biggest joke or the most damned in depth survival guide for mythical creatures. Check this out.... Top 10 Lessons for Surviving a Zombie Attack 1. Organize before they rise! 2. They feel no fear, why should you? 3. Use your head: cut off theirs. 4. Blades don’t need reloading. 5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair. 6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it. 7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike. 8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert! 9. No place is safe, only safer. __________________ Stupendous Monster

03-27-2004, 09:37 AM	#2
damnhooligan Mad Scientist Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Dorksville, USA Posts: 1,745	I need one of these, if only to garnish my coffee table when my in-laws are over. __________________

03-27-2004, 10:06 AM	#3
Brodie Certified Teacher Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Bizarro Metropolis Posts: 6,495	I'm gonna use it for everything. I'll do exactly what it says, because...I mean..........It says "Guide" so it must be true, right? __________________ Stupendous Monster

03-27-2004, 12:55 PM	#4
Skeletoncrew Foot Elite Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Bearing in on your spicy brains Posts: 3,275	That's on my wishlist. Of course, I don't see an important piece of advice there: Learn to use a gun BEFORE you need it. __________________ Adult TMNT fan art and fiction contest Now accepting entries!

03-27-2004, 12:58 PM	#5
Brodie Certified Teacher Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Bizarro Metropolis Posts: 6,495	Well, people automatically know how to use all guns in a zombie situation.....See most zombie movies ever created....Some how some little priss girl knows how to use a glock or an assault rifle...Via House Of The Dead.... __________________ Stupendous Monster

03-27-2004, 01:14 PM	#6
Skeletoncrew Foot Elite Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Bearing in on your spicy brains Posts: 3,275	Yeah, incredible isn't it? I was going to take a handgun course next month, but my school schedule is too busy. I'm putting it off until summer. __________________ Adult TMNT fan art and fiction contest Now accepting entries!

03-27-2004, 01:22 PM	#7
damnhooligan Mad Scientist Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Dorksville, USA Posts: 1,745	Ah, summer is prime zombie season in these parts. __________________

03-27-2004, 02:13 PM	#9
cqb101 Cinephile Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Salem, MA Posts: 8,489	I must have that book. Brodie, where'd you order it? __________________ Facebook

03-27-2004, 02:18 PM	#10
Brodie Certified Teacher Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Bizarro Metropolis Posts: 6,495	You can order it anywhere. But I got mine off Amazon for 7 bucks. __________________ Stupendous Monster

03-27-2004, 04:37 PM	#11
愛 Super Moderator Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 7,449	Those zombies be damn crazy! I should pick it up.

03-27-2004, 04:40 PM	#12
Shadow the hedgehog Hench Mutant Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Space Station 77 Posts: 280	Zombies. No match for me.

03-28-2004, 12:25 AM	#18
Wes Mad Scientist Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: A very scary place. With crayons! Posts: 1,607	Yeah, a pal of mine sent this book to me a few months ago -- I haven't finished it yet, but it's been a great read so far. I like to take it with me to read when I'm riding the Metro. I've gotten a lot of odd looks -- people tend to be kind of wary of a guy in a black trenchcoat with black boots and black-and-red anarchy laces, especially when he's reading a book with weapons on the cover and gun illustrations in the text -- but at least they leave me some space and don't plop their three-foot asses down next to me. __________________ * Scary-Crayon * Wesoteric * Chew your gum properly, ok? Aaand... Technodrome buy/sell/trade thread here!

03-28-2004, 02:21 AM	#19
Skeletoncrew Foot Elite Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Bearing in on your spicy brains Posts: 3,275	Hah hah hah! Much like certain insects, Wes has developed protective markings that ward off unwanted contact. __________________ Adult TMNT fan art and fiction contest Now accepting entries!

03-28-2004, 10:50 AM	#20
Demonfox38 Stone Warrior Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 531	This movie will give you a crash-course on killing zombies with guns . . . Nothing says Zombie Smiting like a YMCA pool full of holy water!